Ok so for the past 2 years i have thought a hidden camera was hiding in my head recording my every move. Everything has been broadcasted over tv and i heard the tv talking to me for 2 years. So now im coming to the realization that that never happened and its making me lose my sanity. To think my mind has left me like that is driving me insane literally. Im so afraid that i might slip into pure insanity.
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Coming to terms with the fact that your mind has been playing tricks on you is something we all go through. And it’s tough.
You sound like you’re getting saner and not going insane.
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I agree with @everhopeful,
You sound like you’re getting better instead of worse.
We all have delusions that are difficult to overcome,
Knowing that they are delusions is half the battle.
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I think your getting more sane rather than insane
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When I was driving today , I was thinking how did I ever get through the bad times years ago, when I was going through what you are. Meds fixed it for me
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I feel the same way, a camera in my head, TV commentating on me, they can see pictures in my mind I feel like I am going crazy, little peace of mind, I wish it was just my imagination.
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Its hard for me because it is hard to believe my mind was actually playing tricks on me like that.
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That’s understandable. Relating from my own experiences, it seems sometimes the mind wants to come to any logical conclusion that there isn’t some illness and that the delusions are real. Looking back the conclusions are far too illogical in the end to be real. I don’t think there’s a camera watching you. It may just be your mind trying to convince you there really is something there. I experienced a similar thing.
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I know it is so hard but you have to rationalize with yourself and tell yourself that its not possible. How can a camera be put in your head? I still hear the television talk to me but i hold on to the fact that a camera in your head is not possible and that drags me out of the delusion. I know it’s going to be an ongoing battle but i have to hold onto the realistic.
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I think it hurts for a while, when you find out that what you believed in isn’t and wasn’t true, and you get confronted with the reality of the situation. But after some time, you learn to adapt and get better at acceptance.
It’s frankly great that you’re making this progress
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I completely agree
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Thankyou. Im learning to adapt now
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I hope you continue to improve! The medication helps those type of symptoms significantly. Sometimes we just have rough days.
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Yes today was kind of a rough day. Reality slapped me dead in the face, threw me for a loop.
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Somedays can be like that. Just keep on mind you’re a person who suffers from an illness. It is difficult to accept in the beginning but once you do, you’ll find it helps shake of delusions as a false reality. Don’t forget you’re still a person though and not ill all the time! Luckily for me the only delusions I’ve been dealing with lately are not of persecution. Feeling like you’re being followed and surveilled all the time can be stressful.
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Delusions are like a false reality you are right. And i know its difficult thinking you are being followed but doesnt knowing that you have the illness kind of help you.
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I also have to be realistic, I pray no one can see the thoughts inside or make me say things that I don’t want, or be able to hurt me psychicly which is going on with me right now.
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There is no camera on you. And your thoughts are your thoughts.
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I discover every day that what I’ve thought and how I’ve seen the world my whole life is almost completely wrong. I discover huge gaps in my knowledge. I discover every day that people are nothing like I thought they were when I was growing up. I discover a lot of people I know are really nothing like I thought they were.
To hell with it! I don’t care. I’m going to keep going to my job three days a week, I’m going to sip my Cokes, still be friendly and try to be nice and keep a good attitude and enjoy what I can in life and reminisce on the first 57 years of my life of working for 35 years, going to college and having fun. And hopefully the last 45 years I have remaining I’m going to laugh a lot, enjoy nature, and enjoy seeing pretty women.
“If you can’t join them, beat them” is my new motto (man, that’s pretty cool of me, I just made up that last saying on the spur of the moment!).
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Well, you know what they say… “When you wish upon a star,” and all that jazz.
Seriously though, it is your imagibation. Your own mind, playing tricks on you. Everything you just said is a delusion. The longer you hold on to your delusions, the longer you’ll be sick, the more parts of life that you’ll miss. There’s this saying that my mom said to me once (a few times possibly). She said “you can’t worship two gods,” meaning you can’t fully devote yourself to both the creator and, say, the pursuit of fame. I kinda tweaked the saying a little bit. You can’t live in two realities. Whether you reject your delusions and face our shared reality, or you reject shared reality and chase your delusions, you have to choose. I hope you’ll choose to live in our shared reality. It’s much better than being alone with your hallucinations and delusions.
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