I originally joined this forum because my fiance potentially has sz, but reading through this subforum kind of made me question myself. I don’t want to say it, but I have to say it. It’s like I’m fighting myself every step of the way and buying more time to not admit it.
When I was 16, I was writing a book about a guy who meets a demon and goes to hell. I would sit down to write and come to with a full page written about hell. I started talking to demons, seeing them everywhere I went (not physically, kind of like there was a double exposure in my vision and everything). They would move things. Cause things to happen. I started getting pretty heavy into the occult.
Soon after I started interacting with the demons they started telling me that I was actually carrying a shard of one of Lucifer’s daughters inside myself and that my soul was mixing with that of hers. I heard them at times. I could feel them over my shoulders as I tried to go to sleep at night. At times after I would talk to them I felt like I could feel the ground, like I was a part of it, and I could feel the bugs crawling inside of me.
I kind of drifted off from talking to them because Lucifer lied to me and I didn’t like hell for what it really was rather than what he showed me from the start. I interacted with high level demonic lords. I did magic.
I have an entire 45,000 year old demon’s memories floating in my head. I’ve always kind of had this going on. They’ve been watching me since I was a toddler. When I close my eyes I can see Lucifer talking to me, or taking the shape of a giant snake and giving me his power.
I don’t know. I’m leaving a lot out. I can’t piece everything together. I lose huge chunk of time and everything gets scrambled out of order.
Oh, and at another point, I talked to Gabriel and he said Raphael was coming and I needed to wait for his message. That was about a month before Lucifer started talking to me, which was about three months after I first started talking to demons.
I don’t know. I need to stop writing.
You think that ■■■■ is real? Religion is delusional. Did God create man or did man create God? I heard the devil until I stopped believing it was him. Your brain is special it does these things to you, but I promise you its all hallucination. Religion just breeds psychosis like yours. Im being a bitch but I bet there is a part of you that like hearing these voices. Makes you feel special doesn’t it? Sorry I dont mean to attack you but after reading that those are my thoughts.
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What did you mean when you said:
The reason I ask is I see demons too. Not physically, more in my head, but it’s so vivid it’s like they’re standing right next to me and I can feel their presence too.
I’m sorry you’re going through this. There are times we can invite demons in through the occult, but you’re most likely experiencing hallucinations. That’s what my doctors call it. If this is interfering with your life then you should see a doctor and be honest with them. The reason I know they are hallucinations is the treatment worked. Don’t be scared though there’s nothing to fear. Best of luck to you. 
i thought i would say hi.
i believe in a karmic hell or heaven on the lines of buddhism.
but there is no god or the devil, though there are people who look after these areas who maybe mistaken as lucifer and god, but they are not.
i also talk to demons and everything else, upstairs and downstairs.
you are not alone on this site, we are all in the same boat to a certain extent.
what you hear and see cannot hurt you, but good on you for being brave enough to post it, it is good to talk about these things rather than letting it build up inside , no one will judge you here.
take care
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It seems like some kind of psychosis, I have had same delusions too, consult with a psychologist.
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It’s exactly like that. It’s like they aren’t physically there but when the scene in front of me registers in my head they’re standing right in front of me. Or walking around, or doing other stuff, but they’re always interacting with the environment and I see stuff changing when they touch it, but no one else sees them, just the stuff moving.
I have to agree- religion and psychosis? ■■■■ NO
Religion IS psychosis. We dont need delusions on top of delusions. ■■■■■■■ adam and eve my ■■■■■■■
Religion is for sane people who dont like being sane. That’s the way I see it. All of the really religious people I know are really similar to mentally ill people in their behaviors (talking to themselves and speaking about people and things theyve never even seen), religion is for people who have something wrong with them. It’s good for people with less severe disorders but not psychotic people.
Hallucinations are bad, its good that you know that these are delusions. I dont care if you hear god complementing you, they’re bad
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IF you’re a demon incarnate you wouldn’t be able to type anything yo…like seriously let the devil dance alone. The occult is nothing to play with and though many don’t really find interest or believe in it I still DON"T consider this ■■■■ a game. Like looking into the abyss? The abyss looks back at you…you need to really consider any occult of infernal studies you took up and resolve your magickal thinking immediately and ground yourself in reality.