When I was 10-12 years old I was sent to a tutor house and was being taught and disciplined by the tutor,I stayed at her house for one and a half year.During that stay,my self esteem was high and I was known as a cheerful kid at school and most people liked me.I am 25 this year,I had only felt happy because someone pushed me to work hard,the other 20++ years I was seldom happy and didn’t really feel in control
Today,now,I workout everyday(my method of staying disciplined).Although My self esteem wasn’t as high as I were during 10-12,in fact it’s below average,but I hope there will be one day I can make improvement till I enjoy happiness and better confidence level.It might or might not happen but I hope it will,this time I will push myself and find myself not depending too much on others,thanks!
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Maybe you are going at it the wrong way… have you tried CBT? Is your internal dialogue supportive and praising or negative? I think for most people self esteem comes from the way they think about themselves and from respecting themselves and praising themselves, etc, and not mainly from achieving things. Although achieving goals surely helps too. I have failed at most of the things I wanted to achieve as a child and teenager, but my self-esteem recovered because I changed my internal dialogue.
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I has tried CBT,it is indeed useful and had helped me but I quit 3 months ago because I was doing better and I didn’t want to spend the money on therapy(expensive for a hour).Now I need to depend on myself and try to help myself up!
I think what you said about healthy self esteem is right
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Good luck, I hope things look up for you!
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Thank you very much
Hope everything will be good for you also
Looking back on my life i wasnt happy also. My best year was 2014 after second time psychosis when i found myself.
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Congratulation of finding yourself,I am trying too