probably because I was always active in my own mind. I would start to get into a conversation and then tune out when they couldn’t keep me interested. a lot of “uh huhs” head nods and years of lost conversation.
now im more sedate because of the meds, and have less inner distractions, my listening is improving but it’s still a challenge sometime.
the way my dad communicates can get a little trying. he “beats around the bush” and has a hard time getting to the point. most of my daily conversations are with my dad and have been for years. I find he is a good listener however and he also remembers conversations. it’s funny because in a way he is more macho than me in terms of physical strength, but he is also a little more sensitive than me. he likes to listen whereas I had a habit of trying to control conversation.
even when I was hearing voices I would try to manipulate their words and would have difficulty listening to what they were truly trying to tell me. sometimes talking to me is like talking to a rock or something.