The more I think about our world,
The more meaningless I feel.
I have 0 influence over any bad crap which is happening.
And not only world… my parents never took me seriously.
Also, I have very simple and not very respectful job.
And overall I feel like I am not even equal to orhers - but also worse, because I have this SZ thing.
Sorry for being so negative. I truly feel so so tired that I want to sleep for 2 next days.
I have respect from my current psychiatrist. But I stopped expecting it from society. My father takes life to seriously. He does not give me respect for just suffering from SZ. He gives me respect for any functioning he can get me to do.
I hope you rest and recover and build. I am in my 50’s age wise. I am finding more meaning in life even at my age. I am building from rest and recovering from rest (especially good sleep). I have been exhausted and suffering and I know I can deal with it. But I want to learn how to be vibrant and joyful and functioning. Something I still have to learn how to deal with and get used to. I am trying to also respect myself as much as I can. And my confidence is currently building. I don’t feel as rebellious as I was which is making me enjoy the things in life I have to do more.