I have come to the realization that when it comes to trying to win an argument against a “Normal” person, I will always end up the loser.
I just cannot keep up with “Normal” brain people - they will always win the argument - They will always win the race.
They will always be faster, more cunning than me - I seem to fizzle out when I try to keep up with the Rat Race.
I tend to do things a lot slower than they do, chugging a long at my own steady pace - Its frustrating most of the time, but what can I do.
I have to accept the fact that God gave me a damaged brain and I can never fit in with “Normal” Society.
Talking to my brother on the phone, was an ordeal for me.
Going to the Supermarket with my Dad today was a struggle for me - It was a huge store filled with lots of busy, fast paced shoppers - I just cant keep up, Man I am so drained
At the end of the day, I lie down in my bed. Post on SZ.com, maybe read a book, listen to music. And winning, competing, everything in life that seems not so trite throughout the day, sometimes, doesn’t matter one bit to me. I can put that all to rest and just enjoy the relaxation of my bed. I try to carry this mentality into the rest of my day too. But this is how I think of it. You’re born, you die. Whatever happens in between is up to the way you think. My friend is always talking about things like “I wanna be rich. I wanna go to the gym and be strong. I got in a fight”…none of that stuff matters to me as long as I could have the mentality I have right now as I’m lying in my bed and carry it into my everyday life.
Besides, you have tons of great traits. I’ve known you well enough for a long enough time to know that you may not ever be the Jeopardy champion or a great debater like you say (i dont know maybe you can for all i know), but you’re kind, insightful and just a cool dude Imo.
Who cares? I don’t anymore. I’m now opted into like 40 years of disability payment, I don’t even have to work anymore (can’t anyway, at the moment). I’m not sure when to file for retirement, but when I do I’ll be awaiting a happy death from then on out - hopefully in sleep (pray it be in sleep, brain is ready to die before any other major organ).
And I don’t believe God gave us damaged brains. I believe in womb theory, that our brains were damaged in virtuo from contaminations - be it water, meats, cigarettes, or drugs (legal or illegal). Either way, something triggered genetic vulnerabilities in us and it was wholly unfair. Hopefully God saw it all and is willing to reward us specially. I once had a dream in which we were all standing in an assembly and there was a special “vow of silence” that everyone had to observe to honor schizophrenics. It was impressive.
At least we’re not totally without safety nets - we are guaranteed SSi & other monetary assistance. Also, I strongly feel I have a God & certain spiritual “friends” on the “other side”.
What I have noticed, though, is that “normal” people tend to be more vulnerable emotionally and are typically weaker-minded. We’ve been so blunted by hardship that we know the in’s & out’s of how to survive it.
I’ve said this a few times, I think, to others - we’re swapping out weaknesses for weaknesses & strengths for strengths, but they’re less difficult ones. Life is easier in the macro-perspective of things, for me, it’s the tedious micro-perspective of things that I struggle with.
Wave, could a “normal” person cope with this illness? Most people wouldn’t be able to. You’re very, very probably the bigger person when all is said and done.
I had the same problem over my vacation with my mom and aunt. They are both devote Republicans (they think they are Christians). They both love the David Duke (a KKK racist) and prostitute loving politicians (google David Vitter Red Shtick) of our state, but they call me out when I say their Planned Parenthood lies are lies. Refer to the lie that Planned Parenthood sells fetal tissue to researchers.
The way I see it, is if you are challenged by evil (or someone who is wrong) that is a good thing. You don’t want to be on their side, even if it is the winning side. It is important to know what is right and do what is right. You are living the right way. You’re a caring person and a valuable person. Don’t let the arguments bother you. We are right.
On this topic, just imagine when we get our brains back and don’t feel like we’re being dominated by some other dimension(s)! I’ll probably laugh hysterically for days! lol. The joys of conscious freedom once again!
lifes not a race its a marathon and for us its like running a double marathon. let them compete with each other.
sometimes just getting out of bed for the day is tough. we have our good days and bad.
just keep on going.
I think everyone struggles with their weaknesses. And everyone has them. Feeling subpar in the intelligence department is one kind of weakness, and schizophrenia is correlated with lower than average IQ, but it is not actually a symptom of schizophrenia. And there are plenty of normal people who struggle similarly. Cognitive decline, however, is a symptom of schizophrenia that affects smart people as well as less smart people. And it is very tough to accept no matter where on the scale you end up.
I think that I am pretty bright, this is not an issue - maybe its a bit of cognitive decline - I just get over whelmed easily , when I am doing too much - its frustrating just to try to keep up in the Normal World sometimes.
Yes I notice this too, especially on bad days.
My biggest issue though is my memory. Really messes up arguments when you don’t remember what has been said.
most of the time they think they have the upper hand cause they make more money then my self, as far as normal taking care of them self, horse shat. I find a lot of capble sz people all the time doing all the cleaning that normals refuse to do. are they just mean, why yes and dumb for it to.
To be honest I don’t really engage in arguments. And if I do I always hold my tongue. It’s like I want people to underestimate me - I think that Ives me an advantage when it is really necessary.
Hi wave just love yourself throughout symptoms and all and you’ll do fine. I accept the fact I cannot keep up communications with friends. Arguments to me are petty I mean what is the reward is it worth the competition? We are normal people with a condition but we are still people.
