i came to the conclusion that i should go back on it
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Talk to your doctor. 
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it’s almost impossible to contact her
Oh my word 
I don’t know what to even comment but this comment.
? what have i done to you
Well , to be fair you give me reasons to stay on meds. I wouldn’t go off them for the life of me.
I know I was dumb and got physical withdrawal symptoms (or what I assume to be those)
You don’t want Clozapine withdrawals, they’re the worst, cholinergic rebound. Aren’t you on blood tests for Clozapine anyways? They will find out you’re not on it and may force you to take it.
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Yes I’m on blood tests but they’re like once a month or so
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how long have u been on clozapine?
i took a few day break while i was on it, because my white blood cells dropped. if i remember correctly i didnt have to restart the dosing lower i just went back to my regular dose.
u should ask ur doctor tho.
For over 2 years total
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