I have the worst problem I have ever went through. I eat food that has been poisoned and at the same time I have sickest people in my body trying to live inside me, they take control of my body and mind and make me act like a dumb and unkind person. I am losing everything, my memory sometimes, my reputation, my health, my looks, and perhaps my relationship and I feel so stupid like I can’t control anything in my life. I know my writing and speaking skills are suffering. What I really want seems like it would take a miracle. People in my neighborhood are getting so upset at me. They think I am driving recklessly, saying racist comments to them, or calling them names but I am not. I feel so brain damaged. I would just lose my mind if I didn’t look like myself or look attractive. I went insane when I looked so terrible in the mirror a couple days ago. In my whole life I never felt so mistreated. I am so afraid of financial ruin and getting hurt by people in my mind and having memory loss, or being mentally disabled. I had none of these problems before. I am being abused by people not worth the time of day. A woman whom I admired, sometimes suggests what I should eat or wear but I don’t like people watching me shop or eat I am really private too. I don’t deserve this treatment. No one has ever went through what I experienced. I can’t forgive them either. The act so jealous whenever they think I did something no one else could do. I hate being changed inside and out by them. They make me feel so ugly. I can’t get them out of my body.
Have you talked to your psychiatrist about how you’re feeling? I would highly recommend you do.