I have a question about the how you feel about hallucinations (visual and auditory) and delusions once you go on medication for paranoid schizophrenia.
For someone experiencing severe paranoid delusions (living in another world much of the time), will you still believe these things are real, they’re just less threatening and less frequent, or will you come to understand they are part of an illness and were never real?
Thanks so much.
thought i would say hi
take care 
Welcome.
I understand my hallucinations aren’t real. I recognize when I’m getting delusional. But I have a hard time remembering what happened IRL while psychotic. I remember my delusions but not ppl I met.
You’re asking us? Ha-ha that’s almost funny. Aren’t the professionals supposed to know? Go ask them.
Honestly I have trouble seeing it as not real. I go in and out of trying to ignore the presence of my hallucinations but always wind up back in the same state eventually. Sometimes I don’t believe it’s real at all, sometimes it dominates reality, other times it’s like it’s real but it’s not. I know I’m safe I’ve known that since I got out of the hospital the second time.
Different meds do different things. It’s a trial and error process to see which med does the best at normalizing the mind. Unfortunately none of them are going to make the experience 100% normal. Not without a lot of time, therapy, and luck.
Lifestyle goes a long way as well. Proper diet, consistent sleep, moderation of alcohol and coffee. Some people can’t handle either of those at all.
Illegal drugs are a no no. This disease is not typically degenerative unless the sz is maintain some bad habits.
thank you for your help
thank you for sharing–that is helpful. i hope you’re doing okay.
It’s important to recognize early signs of psychosis. Write down early signs on a paper. Share it with the pdoc.
Unfortunately early signs can only be recognized after several times of psychosis. What was similar to the situations? What started it? Stress, insomnia, depression, mania, agitation, hostility, isolation, paranoid thoughts etc
Hanging in there. I get closed to where I need to be, then I get comfortable and drink too much coffee or even an energy drink or two. I will also start staying up later and whatnot. Different things come together and I wind up in a terrible state. It’s a complicated illness and I’m not certain of all the factors behind mini relapse. Things like money or girls problems or lack of attention from friends and poor chemistry, they come together to produce a state of worthlessness, directionlessness, self-loathing, all sorts of things. Most people go through that at one point or another, but on top of that the sz is hallucinating.
I’m doing fine right now, was doing great a few days ago, yesterday however was completely terrible.
Life is a journey. For a schizophrenic it’s even more complex and hazardous.
The primary purpose of AP’s is to destroy delusions and hallucinations. They work better on some people, and not as well on others. It can take some trial and error to find the right AP and the right dose for many people. AP’s have some unpleasant side effects, so the pdoc’s try to find the least unpleasant dose. For most people AP’s cause a general weakening of the body. They disrupt the body’s temperature regulating mechanisms so that you’re more susceptible to hyperthermia in summer and hypothermia in winter. Some of the AP’s cause weight gain.
It is my understanding that medication primarily makes the hallucinations disappear. It is not uncommon, however, that delusional thoughts about what happened persist. Those can be treated with therapy.
Meds never gave me much relief. Some locals suffered a nervous after meeting a wealthy person threatening to mess us up. Actually she was sex abuse victim who told all the ladies a bunch of scary stuff about her abuser, even introduced us immediately. This caused PTSD in victims who lived alone and some girls in college who were away from home. I know she did this to LOTS of people here as cops ignore this like a scam here & even have set plan to ruin victims that has played out over 20+ years almost exactly. Lady knew exactly what she was doing but abuse was so bad over the years, she really didn’t care. So, eventually all the memories returned at once and many had a nervous breakdown…This is called selective amnesia. As I was running at 100%+ at nasty & demanding job & I functioned fine, stress level was pretty high anyways but had memory blanking on just this lady’s stuff as I lived alone. Some suffered insomnia that sent them to mental care. Mental care here had LOTS of these situations and just took advantage, working the victims up worse and nervous breakdowns resulted and victims usually got fired from their jobs too. Then woman would let her abuse harass the victims sometimes getting a sexual submission and other times they would follow orders from the voices to stalk & verbally harass new victims (thought broadcasting), vandalisms, lots of trespassings, thefts, mess up coworkers/produce more victims for him. Some victims did parking lot which happens in some cities as they hold old cars of the abuses & drive them around to stalk new people. This family was wealthy enough to never really need to work so the males can spend their time messing with anyone from Canada to Mexico, ocean to ocean working on a submission or getting on a plane to do the same. They even buy the submissives same vehicle as person they are torturing so they can park in victim’s driveway.
Other people heard the voices after cracking up in college after meeting a similar type of situation, ex-wives of someone wealthy, unwilling mistresses, sex abuse victims, business rivals can develop psychosis too. Any experimentation with hard drugs also causes induced psychosis keeping the victim close to drug lords for rest of life and more prone to dealing.
If you have a story like this, if you do not talk about the group much, you do not return any contact attempts, you do nothing confrontational about the situations, do not follow orders from voices or talk aloud to self, you may get relief in 2-3 years by ignoring the voices. Do not have any more contact with anyone you met through the group, and you may be stalked.
Some cities just had anyone who was not hearing the voices begin to have psychosis. If you hear orders from voices while out in public, just leave. Voices clear up eventually.
Ex-wive situations are tough. If you do not have any more contact with the spouse & do not discuss the past, sometimes you will get relief. But I really recommend you move away to smaller town as some of these poor ladies end up victims of violent crimes/theft/cop problems if they remained in the city. Can happen in smaller town due to meth lab guy too. Cops in country don’t always care either…
This kind of situation situation I described has left some hearing the voices some of the time for 30 years. As you can assume, my city is pretty screwed up as this group of people hunted in more ways. Other wealthies moved here to make use of this network & their victims. Lots of these groups’ victims do not act right and follow orders from voices to harass people, sit in restaurant in small group to bug another patrol (guided conversation- talking about something humiliating to victim), latch on a relationship to work him/her over, screw up their employer/customers, violent crimes. Recently some churches have really worked on cause stalking /preach stalking sending out their members to harass people in the community who ended up on disability pay after mental care. There is so much anger from these as people who got nothing after their mental problems started…The 20s somethings of this kind of situation are a growing problem & harmful force used against the victims (delusion of persecution). The middle aged men, some of whom made their way by screwing people when voices told them of opportunity, are huge problem of predatorial behaviors hunting down women for sexual submission or just harassment. If any of the males turns a 180 degrees on you or throws a public display of disrespect, you need to excuse yourself from the situation as any more contact and he will probably ruin you.
If you think you have a trespasser, you should not ask for police report unless everything in there was stolen. My police try to determine who is on disability pay for mental care and will lock up anyone who reports trespassing by strangers, even if you see the person leave and know who it is. You will be given a psych evaluation as long as the Dr can justify if you try to report this to police here. There is no way to get restraining order without pictures and most camera systems are broken immediately if you try this route. Neighbor with cell phone is more likely to get pictures of whatever is happening in your absence. Some steal old clothing out of your trash or your old coat so they can come/go without being noticed, especially bad if you wear uniform to work. Consider running it over with lawn mower before you throw out and NEVER wear hats…Burglar alarms are useless as some have found multiple pets running the neighborhood after locking up a house with alarm system or it is set off by trespasser leaving. Changing locks is useless. Some hardware stores steal keys you copy when you first move or almost always when you rent…Copy of key is dropped into trash as accident and retrieved by employee later to facilitate this, but keys can be obtained a number of ways. In my area, extensive damage to personal property for a decade after a nervous break is normal…some had to almost get rid of everything in house & just keep a mattress, work clothing and toiletries in there. And sometimes forced to eat out as the food got frozen or fridge unplugged…One can turn to this lifestyle for a couple years after problems began and things get better eventually. It can be a problem to share walls with the 20somethings in apartments now if you are psychotic. The nuts will stalk you, harass you and noise blast you out so REALLY consider living in detached housing so you can remain functional for work & health by sleeping enough. In some cities, stalking by large gangs of youth who harass new adults (even scaring military away from living near the base) can happen – gang stalking. NEVER answer this kind of behavior aloud but really consider moving as sometimes fires or home invasions will happen next if your community’s kids are pulling this initiation.
This is point when some women get married or shack up. It will keep the predatorial males away, some stalkers and trespassers. It you have a man walk up talking about something private to you, this may be a good invite to accept as he understands it. You have to judge for yourself as people get mostly all good or all weirdo. You just have to find out…A person who doesn’t call you a mental case is best option for success.
First, the mental care will not discuss the social stuff, calling it delusional. So unfortunately, this is the policy of mental care even if it is not in best interest of functioning patients. If you ever get confrontational with the mental care, you will be given a forced psych hospitalization for as long as Dr can justify at your own expense. Just don’t!
What do meds cause? Look up the side effects for sure. Some do cause a LOT of sun sensitivity and you may not be told. I spent a few hours on the lake with seroquel only to have bubble wrap blisters all over head, arms and legs that took 6 weeks to heal. Use caution with the sun for a while and walk at dark or dawn. Risperdal causes a lot of sexual side effects and menstrual stoppage, plus irritable bowl problems, maybe huge weight gain… Zyprexa makes appetite huge and causes LOTS of rapid weight gain. Lower carb type diets get best results to keep weight down, as well as moderate cardio exercise and weight lifting. Lots of people feel like zombie on meds.
Social problems don’t change. You have to try several different meds and take 3+ meds to get results on social problems. You may be in a sick place. I hope you are 18+ so you can make the changes to make the best life for yourself, if not, the time comes eventually. A lot of the people in the community with the sex abuse victim I met were helping here out or harassing people, if you were new to town and had no clue what was happening there, no wonder you got in trouble. This is frequently how things can go for high school kids new to community and FREQUENTLY TAKES DOWN COLLEGE GIRLS HANGING OUT WITH THE WEALTHIES WHO HAVE SOMETHING WRONG. The next thing down the road may be setup to screw you. This is how things work in my city, next good job location down the road will frequently screw up victims 5-6+ times for moving…Ask around to see if anyone else will tell you anything. I HIGHLY recommend you only move if you know a local or you are taking a relationship/roommate. Some of these smaller towns even, especially Colorado, were ruining some women who moved there alone making prostitutes even and ruining your job to land you. YOU MUST KNOW A LOCAL WHERE YOU MOVE IN ORDER TO BE OKAY. Sharing walls is recipe for disaster so expect to need a detached house for best results.
Meds can be helpful to sleep. Seroquel used at bedtime in 50mg+ doses and cut into pieces is most help I’ve found as nothing else stopped the voices, expect for working at hospital job I tried answering all the Dr=Dr calls or emergency paging at 80+ calls/hour. Could not stand the job due to the terrible software they used that barely worked, so had to quit. Never really got to sleep enough anyway in swing shift so was best to avoid this law suit option.
As long as you don’t talk aloud to yourself, the problems with the strangers will pass. I really suggest you take job in back or work on getting jobs from home eventually. Some of the colleges now openly discriminate against mentally ill so you need to pay cash for 2-3 classes before you get student loans or Pell Grant at a college. If you drop because of mistreatment, you may have to pay back either loans or Pell Grant immediately. A psych dr note from your established care relationship can be taken to the Disability Supports office at the college to ensure you won’t be treated wrong…Sadly, this may be needed so you could sue if mistreated. You could use it to take tests/homework in quiet location if professor or students are making loud distractions. YOu may be given alternative assignments if you are doing group assignment and others won’t cooperate. Or you can talk to dean easier if the professor is not following syllabus any longer…I recommend you just keep quiet if you have a professor who is not following the syllabus, and you just file this paperwork and this will clarify whatever he was thinking and all will go just fine afterwards. So sadly, you may have the whole class start to act like 1960s Civil Rights moment in some places so just be prepared…
Some are told to go to a specific church to have the voices stop. This can be a trap. Victim is put through healing circus show, wallet checked and thrown back out onto street with more harassers, even at work. Some people get stuck in wrong church following orders from voices still but lead by a dirty businessman and really unable to leave it without retaliation…Moving away can even be hard if you try one of the huge non-denominational churches or pentacostals. If you are ever shamed from a church called ‘mobbing’ – do not answer & leave the place quietly. You will be okay & this is best outcome for your mistake. Denominational churches frequently will have their members harassing some people too as the whole church just submits to the latest demands from whomever, keep your mouth shut & labor where you can to be okay.
Considering the lady I met who said her family business was driving people crazy, I think it works okay to have duality of beliefs and just keep my mouth shut/respect the care system as it does help with sleep. I ignore a lot of annoying strangers sometimes and just don’t talk about it as recounting it just gives it greater power…I have been screwed at a couple jobs and screwed out of three living arrangements that were too messed up or threatening sharing walls with the psychotics youngers…It has been costly but some of the landlords are dealing with non-discrimination laws in housing by renting out apartment to mental illness victims with nutty behavior case neighbors who were repeatedly a problem…I’m still paying for a housing situation that I could not occupy due to neighbor who I think ran out previous tenants and landlord did not disclose it. (I’m 40 btw.) Some people have been screwed out of multiple jobs at different companies, companies just keeping thugs and running through the poor skilled support help every few months even if not in mental care. Things are tough everywhere…
Hallucinations and delusions are related to an unbalance of the dopamine in the system. Antipsychotics work to redistribute that unbalance. Most people when they find a good fit in their antipsychotic will have a reduction and removal of those symptoms. There are those who regardless of which medication they try have break through symptoms and are known as treatment resistant. Medication alone will not lead to recovery. Intervention in the form of therapy is needed as well to reset the minds misfunction and relearn healthy patterns of thought to counteract dysfunctional mindsets. With the combination of the two recovery is possible. True like all medication antipsychotics have side effects. It is important to relay those side effects to your provider.
Will add one thing about living in ‘sick’ place with too many part-time psychotics working on people & getting people in trouble, lots of smaller towns do a hustle to support the town thug. This is normal in any place bigger than 2k people. I’ve just come to expect it…Smaller towns are usually just extended area of the larger town’s issues…If you leave this kind of thing, you need to keep quiet about reason for move and lie about it. You may well find much worse situations after moving a few times, find out what’s normal there and want to return…Don’t burn the bridge unless is sex abuse, forced drug dealer girls or prostitution involved…
One additional thing to know in this kind of situation, some of the mental care will call this ‘false memories’ and sometimes send the victim back to this kind of thing. Cops where my abuser’s family lived actually called newer victims and told them this is real sex abuse situation with lots of victims and they don’t want another victim. Guess some of the abuse was so old, victim could be tortured into dropping charges so the whole group is still just running around. Typically, they took victims to another jurisdiction away from their family to harm them so traveling with someone you don’t know who seems kind of messed up could really be a disaster for you. Since she usually started to brag about something illegal, is good cue to excuse yourself as soon as possible. (Some try to talk about Jesus or start to tell you two things contradicting themselves is common.)I kept quiet when she traveled with me acting crazy, telling me scary stories about her abuse that happened there so I would remember the story and picture of scene later. Really thought her abuser was going to jump out of the bushes or something around next turn, but kept quiet and did not discuss it. Realized later this caused memory blank-out/amnesia later but at least I was safe through whatever she was thinking + planning.
If you EVER have a pscyh dr say you have false memories, I would RUN! Other person talked about what the therapy did to him for talking to a PDR who used this approach. Any complaining and he would have a lot worse social problems from strangers. This is exactly what happened to me when I got new psych care after moving. Dr wanted therapy & any complaints about anything & I had a ton of strangers bothering me about the subject later, ruined my educational plans when 15 students & instructor harassed me about it later…If you have to use this kind of PDR, I would talk about Jerry Springer show, soap operas or house plant just to keep yourself together & still going okay…
If I had to describe medication in one word it would be this: Freedom.
Initially the meds didn’t make that much of a dent. I’m treatment resistant (contrary by nature probably) so it took time to find what worked for me. When we did find the right meds, I wound up largely free of positive symptoms. No more aliens, voices, or implant delusions. Only get them when I stress myself now.
The meds have unpleasant side-effects one has to learn to live with and mitigate through positive habits, diet, and activity, but they are worthwhile. A good doctor will give you just enough medication to quiet the symptoms, but no more, and will recommend some sort of therapy or CBT in addition to just meds.
Best,
Pixel.
(Over two decades with Sz and doin’ fine.)
Thanks, you guys, for all the thoughtful and helpful responses. I really appreciate it. And I’m so sorry about the struggles and relapses you’ve experienced that are so common with this illness. I wish you all the best.
My meds make me sane 80% of the time. The other 20% of the time involves thinking and being quite sure that people are watching me, like right now, and hallucinating and thinking someone just said something bizarre but I can’t remember if they did or didn’t.
I am taking 1mg 2x a day Risperdal. When I stop taking it for a couple of days to see how messed up I still am, I will begin to get overly paranoid and will have anxiety attacks from my delusions returning to the front and center of my thinking.
I also take a balance of Omega 3,6 and 9 essential fatty acids in the form of Flax, Borage and Fish oils that I will notice more depression after a day of being without them along with the “B” vitamins, ( especially Niacin in the form of Nicotinic acid ) the B vitamin that causes the flush. vitamins and a slew of other herbs and teas and vitamins.
All I know is that I really need them like someone who needs any prosthetic, only our medications act like a prosthetic for our brains. I am so glad to be alive at this point in the development of the new meds and treatments available to us. I’m almost certain that I would be living in a hospital or dead without them, especially if living in the not too distant past. But if you are one who can mange without them, well then more power to you.
I went some 10 years from first developing positive symptoms without medications, but I was using a lot of street drugs to remedy what ailed me back then. My delusions became well ingrained into my ways of thinking and they are only put on the back burner (so to speak) for now.