Grandiosity

Well when I was sick the voices were trying to convince me I was the next saint even though I did not want to be.

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Is it a delusion of grandeur if you like to imagine your someone famous even though you are well aware you are not?

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I don’t think it is. Because you know you are not so its just some visual thinking. Nothing wrong with thinking that if that’s what you want to be Imo.

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I had grandiose delusions years ago. It was actually quite weird.

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I used to think I was smarter than everyone around me, and that I had been born to teach an unknown person something that would save their life.

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We did All About Me posters in 6th grade

and on mine I wrote

I want to be rich and famous and have my name in lights

ha, I guess I never left this small town though

and around here I’m known as Alec and Beth’s mom.

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Really.
Teach them what?

What was weird about your grandiose delusions?

Yes of course.
I feel omniscient, omnipotent, genius etc

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Not omnipotent, but omniscient and genius
For moi

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I do believe you are all-knowing

I can tell.

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I am not omniscient, but it’s just wishful thinking that is very tempting to make me think ooooh what if I can be?
I don’t believe I’m genius.
Sorry for any confusion

I do wonder tough if it’s even possible to be omniscient. Maybe not?

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I’ll bet that’s better than fortune and fame and you wouldn’t change it for the world.

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I’ve gotten over my grandiose delusions. I can still be grandiose, but it’s not so delusional more a bit of mania and not overly psychotic just a little exaggerated. It’s been a long process. I actually had to believe in myself MORE, in order to believe in myself less. Does that make sense??? I can be realistic now. Instead of grandiose delusions covering up the fact I am deep down insecure, I am not delusional anymore because I know now I am not worthless. So I can be realistic. It’s ok because I am great for who I am. Whether I’m messiah or Jon. And I’m jon. Ok??

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I think realizing that youre not meant to be better than anyone else. I developed wanted to be better than mY exes partner. I never wanted to fight with my partner I went 3 years with no arguing bc I really didn’t want to. I did riki for a while I was teaching my baby sign and swedish. I competed against someone who I believed was better than me and sweeter.
He told me I was spineless, I was dumb to him… So, I wanted to be opposite. I realize I’m the hippie who wants to be organic as a goal. Just depression and anxiety got me rn.
He’s def a puppeteer with friends. But the remedy to my problem is I think to overcome this empty feeling and just stop focussing on a physical emotional heart response. The bible teaches against relying on ur heart.
Love is an illusion based of perception. And my key to rational thought is, the guy is almost 30 with a family… I’m an old woman with kids and a hubs I gotta let the old Adela go. She loved him. She adored him but she’s got to burn in a mental sense. So I’ll pray more.

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When i’m manic I sometimes feel like i’m closer to God than I probably am. I try to be humble though. I’ve never felt like I was God or anything like that though.

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I grew up with mysticism. Being one with God was natural to me. I have many mystical experiences and samadhis, I don’t know if it was so easy because of my schizophrenia and loss of ego boundaries

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What are ego boundaries?

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To know that you are these senses and mind. And this is you. If you have thought insertion or thought broadcasting, you lose your privacy and ego is lost

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