I got my dx 5 years ago at age 33. I’m soon 38. I started hearing demons when I was 15 but my world started to crumble when I was 31. Everything just went crazy around me and I was a god of some sort.
What keeps me going? I don’t know. Maybe taking one day at a time. When life is hard, one minute at a time.
I have to remember this when my head is really ■■■■■■. Thanks for some sound advice since I sometimes get impatient when things are tough. I’ve recently had a couple of really bad days but today I’m doing just fine again. It is like it is going to last forever when I’m unwell but when I’m feeling good it is short lived.
I had sz since I was 18 and now I am 31, so its about 13 years I had it. I leaned heavily on my mother when I was first sick, and her prayers and support got me through the hell of the first three or four years. Then I went into remission for five years and God and the Church was the centre of my life and kept me going. Then I converted to Islam and got married and the sz returned. Now it’s just a day to day thing, my husband helps me when I am feeling bad, and my faith in God and prayer helps me through. Also medication has helped a lot. I don’t feel motivated enough to have any goals in life, but I live for the small pleasures in life - the walks to the beach or flea market, the cups of coffee with hubby, or a good library book. That helps me cope day to day.
I’m glad you mention the meds. If it wasn’t for meds I don’t think I would have been around by this time. I wish I could read books like you but my concentration is too poor. By the way I haven’t kept track of everything on the forum, has your book been published?
I have schizo affective disorder and have had it for 13 years now, I went and searched out
answers in astrology,numerology,mediumship, and the bible.
Kind Regards.
Was Dx’d at age 32 years old, now 50…I’ve been “this way” all my life, it’s just now it has a label.
I give up and give in all the time, but I always get back up and start over.
I’m not down for the count, because I want to be a boil on the butt of those who don’t like me.
Since I was 28 I started hearing voices. Been homeless a few times, in the hospital once and now I’m 31 and still hear stuff everyday but I know it’s not real.
Things have been fuzzy since I was 18 where I distanced myself from friends, and grew paranoid, I was diagnosed at 21 in April 2006 and have been living with the diagnosis for ten years. What keeps me going is the little joys in daily life and the promise of a better future, should I abstain from self-destructive behavior. I want to see myself being financially independent, fit and hopefully married, that’s what gives me motivation to push further! 
Thank you everyone for the helpful replies. You are all strong and brave people. This forum has helped to give me insight and courage to go on. Again I’ve gained some wonderful ideas for coping.
Hello,
I am diagnosed schizoaffective for three years.
Fuzzy bunnies keep me going, although I don’t see them often anymore. I reply on tying a bandana on my head and then looking at the displays at the local museum. I want to grow plants, but am scared, so I grow cacti instead, and you know what? It’s better this way.
I’m so amazed at how wonderful all of you are ,being the best you can even with this horrible illness. …may you always find the strength to keep going
I have bipolar with psychosis. Been since around age 23 . Now I’m 27. It feels like it’s been decades. I definitely feel like giving up many times but I’m still going.
Got sick when I was 12 (1994). Was actively psychotic until 2000. Then went into remission for 8 years (until 2008). Got sick again, and have been in treatment ever since. Haven’t had a hospitalization since 2000. So yeah, 21 years with this. I spent 4 solid years in a state hospital (1995-1999). Went in smelling like crap, came out smelling like roses. I don’t quit.
I forgot to mention that music keeps me going when I’m at my lowest. Playing it or listening. It just transmutes the negative feelings and provides relief
I was diagnosed when I was about 15, August 3 I’ll be 34. So I’ve had it for about 19 years, though some of that time my symptoms were well managed…back before my last relapse.
I guess the best thing for me is eliminating as much stress from my life as possible since stress is a huge contributor to my symptom spikes.
Or I try and find a quiet spot to myself to close my eyes and take a few deep breaths, even if it’s escaping to a bathroom…it tends to help.
When I do feel bad I try and think of future goals I have planned for myself and that usually keeps me going. if they don’t seem achievable at the moment I think of the people in my life…my family, my kitty…that usually helps get me through rough times, even if it’s not an immediate release it does eventually help me in the long run. The other thing is I made a promise to myself never to act on impulse wait it out 24, to 48 hours and usually the mood eventually passes.
I know this is something that I will have the rest of my life, and that gets me down, but then sometimes its also a motivational thing in itself…
I haven’t had it for that long, only 6 years, but I’m 25, so it feels like a really long time. The first three years I pretty much isolated myself from everyone and did what the voices told me to, and that was such a living hell. But after being diagnosed, that became it’s own hell too, just a different type of hell. I was suicidal and had to be hospitalized a little over a year ago, or was it two years ago? I can’t remember. I was either turning 23 or 24 when that happened. I guess thinking that God would be unhappy with it, that my family would be sad, and fearing going to hell have kept me from it. The fear of going to hell when i die is slowly wearing off though because I’ve been struggling with it for years now, and each day I start to think maybe hell won’t be so bad, or maybe I won’t end up there. It definitely has a flip side of making it so I’m scared to even drive a car now. I didn’t use to live in such fear before the illness. I would just do what I needed to do. I don’t know for sure why I’m so afraid all of the time. My brother says I need to trust more in God so that I’m not so afraid all of the time. I tell myself that I’m sick of being a coward, that I’d rather be dead than live in fear all of the time, but yeah, I don’t manage very well. On a daily basis I have to listen to christian music almost constantly just to calm my nerves. I have to tell myself that things will work out, or if they don’t that I’m ok with being homeless and psychotic. I probably won’t end up homeless, but sometimes thinking about being old and homeless makes me want to just end it. I’m not coping very well, and sometimes I wonder if I’ll just commit suicide later, although I try to imagine living instead. If I lost my family or faith in God I don’t know what I would do.
It has been like being in a battle for my own sanity which if I lose will be the end of me as I know myself to be. I throw few punches if any at all and survive mainly by rolling with the ones I get.
I’ve been with schizoaffective for 12 years now. I am 33. After the first forced hospitalization in 2003 I didn’t think too much of the illness. I just lived, I was still young. When I mean young I mean that I still had some friends to have a little enjoyment and not think about the my problem, but they are all married now, living together or with children (that’s why I say I was still young). And I didn’t think of it for 6 years. I got a girlfriend for 4 years in between but lost her to the illness due to what happened in the next paragraph.
Then I decided to try to quit my meds and had a relapse in December 2009. I was hard, but it still didn’t hit me that I had a hard problem in my hands.
Last year I decided to quit my meds again to try and see if I could live without them and then the harshness really came pouring in. I lost the few people I had in my life ( “friends” ) and got quite isolated as I still am until this day.
I don’t get delusions or hallucinations but I guess the negative symptoms count, as well as disorganized thinking when off meds.
What keeps me going nowadays? Nothing I guess. This time it really hit me really hard and I spend all my day at home at the computer. Being in a good relationship really helps and having people that talk to you and try to understand you too. Having things to do and enjoying them seems to be a good thing either but I don’t like to do anything. It’s like losing your appetite without no one know the cause for it.
My share of the story.
@Lotus Isolation and negative symptoms are also the two things that I struggle with most.
I’m too scared to try and go without my meds. I’ve had relapsed before while I was on meds and my psychiatrist upped my dosage which quickly helped.
I also used to have lots of friends but lost them because of this illness.
Thanks for sharing.
I still fight on the diagnosis. They insist it’s chronic. Nevertheless.