I am 22, undiagnosed and cannot stop thinking about the possibility of having schizophrenia or something similar. I often think maybe I am overthinking all of this and making it all up. I’ve kept these things to myself for 2 years. I feel that maybe I shouldn’t go to the appointment, because I feel fine being this way and i’m able to study and work. And I wouldn’t be taking any meds or therapy anyway.
I am socially isolated. I speak few words and feel uncomfortable being around people. I cannot look at them in the eyes. I can’t talk to people online, because of weird ideas that everyone hates me or specifically considers me unimportant and stupid. I feel judged and I often overhear people saying my name or somehow laughing about me amongst themselves. I feel that I am being made fun of behind my back for the way I am.
2 years ago I experienced some type of hallucinations and paranoia. I began to see the walls breathe permanently. I was hearing a female voice repeat sentences outside of my head. I often heard all kinds of things I couldn’t make sense of when I was trying to sleep. I felt that I was being watched by invisible beings. I had thoughts of strangers working for some agency and watching me. All of this I understood was produced by my brain, but it kept happening everyday for months and the experiences scared me everytime.
Currently I am doing just fine. I still feel people are thinking negative things about me. I keep hearing my name in audio around me everyday and sometimes it sounds like someone whispered it or a relative was calling for me. I do however feel uncomfortable existing as if my privacy is being disturbed constantly. Logically I’ve never lost it, but there’s always some odd emerging feelings in a seperate part of my mind and senses. I hope I can stop thinking about these problems soon, maybe I just need to distract myself with alot of work, studying and learn to socialise.
Welcome to the forum! Sounds like a lot of the same stuff I went through when I was 22. (I’m 33 now)
I would still go to your appointment. Be completely honest and transparent with them. This is the way. If you don’t vibe after a few appts., that’s fine. There are plenty of pdocs out there. Good luck!
Yeah atleast then I can stop worrying about it. I’ve just been scared to, because I don’t trust psychiatrists at all. But that’s irrational since I’ve never talked to one.
When I was diagnosed, it gave me some clarity. I think this boosted my insight, along with proper meds and good coping mechanisms. You’ll be alright. You can always get a second opinion from another psychiatrist
Welcome to the forum. I remember my first appointment. My only advice would be to be as honest about your symptoms as you can. I tried to hide my symptoms for the psychiatrists for far too long and I regret it now. Good luck.
I’m not going to take medication in any case unless I somehow start believing the things I hear or see. I just want to talk to someone for clarity. If they start talking about any meds on the first visit despite how lucid I am I will never trust “professionals” again.
A psychiatrist will listen to you as you describe all your symptoms and that is called a diagnostic interview. At least, you will stop wondering what you have and then you can discuss a treatment plan with the psychiatrist.