Sometimes i have a glimpse of remembering how to feel normal, bow it would be, sadly it is a memory and I continuw to feel like i am now. Anyone else?
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I don’t think I was ever normal just maybe better at faking it then.
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Yeah I miss being super smart and able to juggle 6 college level classes with a B+ or higher in each one and still find time to game and socialize. 7 years ago I wasn’t hearing voices and I was very clear headed.
Nowadays it’s just one day at a time type of living.
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Normal would be before age 8 for me. And even then i suspect i might have been a little different in certain things. Nope. Cant remember.
I remember the time i was better at pretending and dissociating and lacked the insight to see i actually wasnt normal. But im not sure if that was really that much better. I might prefer my current state.
I don’t know. I always felt like I was the odd one out. But when I look back I’m amazed at the things I was able to juggle back then.
I don’t know if I was ever normal - maybe as a child up to 13 years old. But since then I was ill.
I can remember. I miss it much.
I was close to normal maybe normal for a short time. Had many friends, hung out with them everyday, gym and bath everyday, working, studying in university, going on vacation with friends, going to the beach and aqua park, etc
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I was 135lb up until 23 y.o., 1 year after starting antipsychotics.
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I remember feeling normal as a kid and early teen.
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Those were the days, days with no schizophrenia.
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I was always weird and different. I’ve been receiving psychiatric care since I was 16. But I needed it long before that.
No, because sexual abuse started early. Being ignored by my mother was the first thing to happen. After that came my first psychosis on the first school day in fifth grade. It has gone on for two years. Then I switched school.
Skateboarding was nice the first two years. After that it wasn’t about fun to skate. Everybody else just wasted their time or quit with skating because of trying to get a sponsorship.
Bodybuilding sucked. One half year of aggressive inline couldn’t rescue my psychy.
I always since rape heard voices, because of being bullied I started getting ticks, visual and auditory hallucinations and violent thoughts. I also got commands I resistet. Mostly beating the bullys in the face. The bad, I’m unable to commit suicide. So that will be a long road of suffering.
I can remember when I felt more alive!
I can connect to happiness back then.
Today I feel dead.
Ive been feeling normal lately. Youre as normal as you believe. Whos to say what is the right way how to think or act or live? Peer pressure? We can only do things how we can sometimes for unknown or known reasons.
I do remember because it was only in 2018 that I attempted coming off meds
I noticed a pattern, almost normal, then the same sick nausea, them normal again
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