From my experience, I usually feel myself sick because of my fears, delusions or mental problems. However, lately, I have felt myself fine so I begin to feel that something is wrong.
Have you had the same experience?
Tolteca.
Yes. Sometimes I feel good. I feel too good and I think… Oh no, I feel too good, I must be going manic.
I wonder why the meds are letting me slide into positive symptom. But I have to check it and then realize that what I’m feeling is normal for the situation. Then I’m able to tell myself that I just feel good because who wouldn’t feel good in this situation.
Good luck. Always questioning is the part of this disease I hate. I can never just sit back and enjoy the good times. I always have to question.
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Yep. I often feel tired and want to withdrawal from life. It’s called detachment. Escapism is closely related. I have issues with both. For example, I have class and powerlifting training today- I didnt want to get out of bed. My dreams are always vivid, and they were good dreams, so I really dont even want to be awake right now.
I either drink a preworkout drink and go to the gym and lift crazy heavy weights (powerlifting is a competitive sport in which you lift the heaviest weight as possible) or I take a nap.
Im having a coffee and giving myself some time before I shovel down a high protein breakfast, take my meds and go to class. Mornings always make me feel strange. It’s when I still feel strange in the afternoon, that’s when something is wrong.
I also have some flashbacks to my days before medication, my shrink says that he isnt surprised at all and explained the science behind flashbacks. I am a psych major, in the honors program, on a full ride and I have a high GPA and all that, Im an outstanding student in psychology, so he can explain things rather technically and I know what parts of the brain and what not he is talking about.
I also just have problems with motivation. They’re halfway due to my meds side effects and half psychological. I went from fully psychotic, severely so, to practically cured of schizophrenia due to my meds. The meds are major tranquilizers in reality, I know the science behind them, all of it. It makes sense that my dreams are vivid and I feel a lack of motivation- they effect receptors associated with those two things, among a ton of other things…they also keep me functioning, albeit I don’t want to function half of the time, right now I feel like I deserve the day off because of what I have been through, but I have questions about my logic homework and need to go.
Schizophrenia is complex, and the medications are equally complex, so feeling strange even while everything is actually otherwise OK is nothing surprising to me. I just carry on. There have been very few times where I wasnt actually fine and I had to take the day off. I know how to pick up on signs of a relapse and I know what my triggers are- It’s just sometimes impossible to avoid what is making me feel unsteady. Like last week, I had some panic about finals and a presentation. Well I had to give a presentation and I have to take finals next week. No options, I had to change my outlook, the circumstances are not malleable right now.
Thanks SurprisedJ, I always question about this illness.
Thanks mortimermouse. Your answer is very stimulating. I am user of a sport club where there are swimming pools, facilities, etc; so there is a gym where I hope to take class of weight-lifting in near future.
Thanks again.