I really doubt my friends making skill,I just don’t have even one long term friends,I can’t make a lasting friendship,I am disappointed about this matter
Do you have friends who you actually sees for three years or more?
I don’t have friends. The last time I had friends was when I was 18. I used to hang out with my school friends but they turned out to be assholes. We parted company. Since then, I have come across the odd friend but it didn’t amount to much.
mobc1990 you should join a mental health club…its a good social place to drop in and have a chat/coffee. Mental health clubs are in all cities and a lot of towns. Ask at your local psych hospital or ask your shrink the next time you see him
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I don’t really have friends, I’m normally antisocial…I don’t like socializing, but people who don’t know that they think that I have many friends…lol
But, adding to that; having friends doesn’t mean that the person is normal or not, I know many people that they are super normal and they don’t have friends!
Thx Karl,I like your suggestion I am currently on mental health club once a week trying to make some friends and know more people to not stay isolated
Making or keeping friends is hard for a lot of people. Currently I have one friend although I haven’t seen her for about a year and a half and I only talk to her every 4-6 months. I know it can seem like everyone is out there surrounded by friends but not really.
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I have friends. Not many but I do have friends.
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I have one friend who has recently re-entered my life. I’ve known him since I was six years old.
But we got mad at each other when we were both 17 and both of us stopped talking to the other. He has a kid sis and I have a kid sis and our two kid sis’s decided it was time to get us in the same place and the same time.
I’m glad they both did. It’s nice having this guy around again.
My kid sis is NOT SZ and as she grows up and gets out of high school and moves on to college her “friends” are fading away too. This last incident when she went in for stomach surgery and was in hospital for that, it was surprising how many of her “friends” didn’t even call or contact her in any way.
Friends are sort of hard to keep for everyone these days.
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I am lucky to have good friends. For example, two of them are my lifting buddies, they make sure I am all good in the head before we train, we spot eachother, yell PRESSSS and PULLL and PUSH WITH YOUR ASS at each other, LOL. Then we hangout, usually watch anime (both of my lifting buddies are into anime and I am too). They’re very supportive of me, they even make sure my knees are wrapped tight enough before I do squats. It’s the little things that make friendships so beautiful, hahaha
My other friends dont workout, but we hangout and eat together and generally spend time together. I keep in touch with friends out of town over the internet and see them on winter break and summer break. Like last weekend we all went to a party at one of my new friend’s house and had a good time (but I drank too much, but not enough to interfere with my meds, the doc said I would have to get super drunk for that to happen), and the next day one of my friends heard I was hungover and brought me some taco bell, had me drink a bottle of water and then told me to take a nap.
I am fortunate to have friends who have known me for a long time and understand that I am not my illness. My new friends are from the psychology department, and I am open about my condition, they know I am recovered. I have been hanging out with one of them, and the other two have exchanged phone numbers with me and mentioned things to do together. I think I intrigue smart psych majors because I used to be a stereotypical schizophrenic and now I am really, really with it (powerlifting, being social and making all A’s).
I guess they find people like me interesting because I used to be a different person. They remark that I seem like a different person, that I had a troubled vibe back when I wasnt talkative and not on meds. I just sat in the back of the class and didnt speak to anyone. Now I know the professors personally and joke with them during lectures. For example, my prof knows I have schizophrenia, and he was making an example of social attributions by saying “I see a tropical bird on the table. Does anyone else think that the table affords seeing a bird?” (redundant question, answer is no) and I said “Yeah, I do.” Then he asked me what color it was, I said “Puce” and he said “you know, I think it’s bright orange”
I was popular and had like 30 friends. Did some intense drugs and got schizophrenic. Lived off the map for 3 years and lost every single friend I had. I will have a new start when I go to college in August, Im going to try to meet new friends there.
Most of my previous friends have moved on with their lives. Some got married, some are busy with their career, some I just lost touch with. While others have moved on, I have been stuck spinning my wheels in life.
I do have one friend I see on a consistent basis. He is a bit younger than me but we meet up once a week to play basketball and have dinner. I am so grateful to have him as a friend. I look forward to our time together and it gets me out of the house for some fun and fellowship. We have been friends for about four years. We were introduced by his boss who was a good friend of mine.
Mobc, keep your head up. There are some good suggestions here such as joining a clubhouse and the acknowledging the fact that even people without sz might not have friends. But even having a friend or friends can still make you feel lonely. My best advice is to love yourself first. Do things you enjoy and never be afraid to make mistakes. Show to others that you are a strong individual and maybe you can attract a friend. Good luck.
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The last friend i had in 3D was my wife. I can count the number of definite friends on one hand over 57 years. I feel sorry for those who have friends and lose them when illness develops.
I have two-three friends. One lives across the street from me, and I fear if she ever moves, then we won’t keep in touch too much. One of my friends lives in London, England (I live in the US) and we keep in touch regularly through email. She knows about my illness, but she doesn’t let it define me. I have another friend from college, more of an acquaintance. She knows about my illness now, and she hasn’t said anything about it. We keep in touch through email. I’d like to have more friends, but it is hard making new friends, especially when I’m at college at 40, and everybody else is 18-22. There aren’t any mental health clubs nearby that I’m aware of. I tried keeping in touch with some of the people that I met in the mental hospital. Some of them called to chat for a while, and I’d call them too. But eventually, most of them fell away. That reminds me, I do have one friend from the mental hospital, but we phone about once every 2-3 months, so it isn’t much of a friendship.
Most of my friends have moved out of town but we see each other when they come back home for holidays. I would have to say my best friend is the one I met through this great project we have here called Compeer. Compeer matches up mental health consumers with volunteers who meet to just have fun for an hour or two a week. I have other consumer friends and relatives who have used it and it has been really great for them too. My Compeer friend moved away for work a couple of years ago but we are constantly in touch.
I haven’t had a friend for a year. My last friend was my neighbor down the hall but he irritated me so I stopped contact with him. But we still see each other around our complex and we still have a rapport and talk still. But it while it lasted it was fun going out to eat or out to coffee or whatever.
I think drop ins are a good place to go to if feeling lonely or isolated. Sometimes it’s about being in the physical proximity of others as much as being very talkative. It is nice to share space with people with similar experiences. However many have closed. There are none that are easily available where i live that can be used as often as you need.
It seems that while it’s accepted that people in certain professions may gravitate together socially, the same is increasingly frowned upon for those sharing the experience of mental illness.The excuse it’s about increasing social inclusion but for many with chronic mental health problems especially the real effect is an increase in social isolation. In terms of in depth contact with others for me,most weeks, it’s 2-3 hours depending on whether i go to one or two groups both occurring at different times on the same day.
For over 95% percent of the time i’m on my own
do cuddly toys count ?
take care
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I consider many people my friends, but on many different levels.
Time isn’t a factor either, because when we run across each other we just pick up where we left off.
I just keep an open mind about people.
I have one close friend who knows more about me than my husband. Then I also have 3 other friends I sometimes meet and drink coffee with. And ofcourse “grandma” in our house. She is 83 and we are good friends.
I have friends I still talk to and visit with, but since I live in a remote small town it is limited…my best friend Matt comes to see me about every two months because his job brings him to my town…other than that, it’s just a text or two on the weekend with him…my other friend, Pam, keeps in close contact with me and emails and calls, but I never see her, she lives in Tulsa, same as Matt…both friends were college friends, and we are pretty close I guess…
Today my art instructor showed me she is a really good friend…I had cancelled my last two lesons due to depression and she just came by to check in on me…made me feel really good…
I guess my best friend right now is my mother…she comes once a week and we go shopping and out to eat…I feel very lucky that I get to still see my mother at my age…she is 70 now and I worry about losing her some day…oh well…she will probably outlive me as I smoke and drink still even though I’m overweight…
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i made some friends at college 
i must have a young personality because i was able to make friends with the best people in the class in my opinion, i am trying to keep in contact with them and them with me which is good they are really nice and the nicest one is trying to get us all to go back to college together again in august.
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