Dear daydreamer,
Thanks for your answer too. Thanks for praying for me! I am a little stronger now but it’s only temporary. Could you tell me which meds are you on? Perhaps they can help me too, I can tell my doctor. Thank you again!
I have tried 3 anti-depressants and the ending was that my psychosis got worse, I can’t risk it anymore, thanks for your interest though, I appreciate it.
Hi, I am sorry to hear that you have been going through some rough patch of your life. Please have faith in humanity.
I can understand that things can be pretty tough sometimes. People are sometimes rude and mean to us but just for some moments think about this. Maybe, they are also having some tough times in life so that’s why they are behaving rude to you. Forgive them for this. Your strength lies in facing the problems in life with courage and your head high. Those who target others for their problems are often coward and weak.
Don’t be like them. I tell you one thing, the racists are very narrow minded people. If you observe them closely, their personalities do not grow because they always see bad side of others and good side of themselves. This shouldn’t bother you any more now. Never treat anyone inferior because of their colour, gender, language, sexual preferences, education, profession or social status. It may not be as bad for the other person as it would be for you.
As szAdmin advised you, maybe change you psychiatrist and see if you feel better. Don’t hesitate in describing what you feel or think. Your English is very good. If you don’t like talking about the stuff with your doctor/psychiatrist or you cannot gather your thoughts in one session then write down here or on paper and forward it to him/her. Never feel yourself alone. If you are comfortable talking to your parents, siblings, friends or partner, feel free to do so. There is no better use of their companionship than this.
I wish you best of luck and will be keen in knowing how’s things going for you!
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everyone is different though, like what works for me might not work for you,
everybody’s brains are all wired up differently so if i told you what meds i was taking and they didn’t work for you then that wouldn’t be very good would it?
sorry if you think i am being weird talking like this, its just i don’t want to be responsible if someone has a bad reaction to a med that i have recommended,
i hope you understand.
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Dear p2r,
Thanks for your answer and your encouragement. Perhaps humans are so bad only for a while, perhaps they feel bad about us and they only express it in some moments, because they are trying to hide it. I wish it is the first one as you say. I agree with you, racism isn’t a bad thing, but it’s sth we 've been taught, no child is a racist. So it’s hard to throw it away from us! I don’t know if there are any people that are not at all racists with our illness and would like for example to have a relationship with us.
I can’t change my psychiatrist, because I live in a small town with only a few doctors, and only my therapist specializes in cognitive-behavioral therapy and it’s hard for me to travel to a new city. Perhaps he is good and I should tell him more about how I feel and think. I always feel alone, that’s the sad thing about me. 
I tell my friends my problems though. Thanks for your wishes and I wish you the best.
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Well, I asked you because you might are on a medicine that’s in the US and not in other countries, a new med. So, perhaps new meds work for more people than the old meds did. In my country for example, Latuda hasn’t still arrived, we are pretty back on this. Anyway, thanks for your support and I wish you have everything you desire.
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Please don’t feel alone. You can share whatever you feel. There are many honest people who would read your thoughts and approach you with possible solutions and opinions.
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How do you spend your time?
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As far as everyone else seeming happy, in AA they call that “judging your insides by other peoples’ outsides”. There’s a poem called “Richard Cory” that might help you. I can relate to being unhappy, but afraid to die. I’ve felt that way before. To me it seems like you’re stuck in a bad frame of mind. That will often pass of its own accord. It might seem like it never will end, but it will.
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Thank you very much for your support! All I need right now is find a boyfriend, that would make me not feeling alone, because I 'm single for a very long time (more than ten years), if we except 3-4 relationships that were for a few months and didn’t really love me. Before these ten years, I had a relationship that lasted 1,5 year, but I still suffered a lot because he didn’t respect me. This along with the bad people I met and no friends and my illness, made my life miserable, but I hope that will change.
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I am in front of a computer all day, apart from 1-2 hours that I 'm out for coffee. I enjoy these two hours, but when I come home with my parents, I feel alone and empty.
Thank you very much for your supportive words, I never was happy for a long time, so that’s why I was so pessimistic. I hope this time if joy comes to me, that it will last for more so that I can be a little happier. I wish you and all the people who answered me to always be happy.
Some people can’t handle anti-depressants. I am also one of those people sensitive to those types of medications. My mom was first diagnosed with depression and took Prozac which made her worse, because she wasn’t being treated for psychosis and the doctors thought it was post-partum depression, or because she gave birth.
I’ve known for awhile that I shouldn’t take them. My last psychiatrist wrote that in her files upon request that I am sensitive to anti-depressants. However, I can handle stimulants at a low dose like vyvanse or adderall. I can’t handle medications like Lexapro or Celexa, Wellbutrine, etc. I can’t handle Geodon and my theory is that it has a certain chemical in it that I’m allergic to. I became three times worse when I was put on Geodon then before when I wasn’t on any medications at all. In fact, it brought out the psychosis.
Abilify works the best as an anti-depressant and anti-psychotic for me, but it can risk suicidal thoughts and feelings, a rapid relapse psychosis, etc.
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Sometimes quetiapine can be used to treat depression. Maybe it will have a double effect for you?
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This makes me think your depression at least might be ‘situational’ and you might not need an antidepressant.
You have definitely got a conversation going with everyone here. What kinds of things do you do when you’re at home? I know I had a sort of hard time living with my parents. Alone, etc.
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I m sorry to hear that, I m also allergic to Geodon and sensitive to anti-depressants. I hope everything goes well to you!!
Thanks, I’ll search for it. Always be well.
Hi,thanks for your answer,as I said when I 'm home I use the computer to talk with my friends or search for things,and I also watch tv.
Yes, loneliness is very stressful and hard on people. Good friends are also very helpful - so make the effort to meet new friends and sometimes they turn into the best relationships.
You might try getting involved with groups doing things you like in your area as a start. They are great ways to meet people who like what you like doing - and get you out of the house. You can try places like Meetup.com and Craigslist activity partners for these types of things:
http://newyork.craigslist.org/search/stp?query=w4m
Have you tried the free internet dating sites:
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