In Summer of 2012 i started thinking i could use “superpowers” to alter the real world and situations to reflect how mighty i was… I believed that I was Jesus, and I do not want to blasphemy the Holy Spirit for that might be an unforgivable sin, but I thought i had super powers and could communicate with the dead… I then thought I was a demon from Hell and that I was going to Hell for eternity because of my sins… scary stuff to wake up to thinking about on a DAILY BASIS!!! I then thought i was going to be the next president of the United States of America… but I realized i have no political connections or millions of $ to fund a campaign and so I am delusional BUT i recognize that these things are not real.
In summer of 2013 i started posting things on facebook about the end of the world and i was freaking my friends out. Eventually I deactivated my account. I started to think people were spying on me and watching me through my MacBook Pro and my iPhone camera and i just snapped!!! I admitted myself to psychological ward Summer of 2013/Fall of 2013 and took a leave of absence from grad school…
I tried risperidone (sucked) olanzapine (blew balls) abilify (worked ok but made me go from 225 --> 299.5 lbs), and finally DUN DUN NUH NAHHH! LATUDA, I have been on lurasidone/latuda since June 2017 and I am no longer sleeping constantly, hating my life, wanting to die, and being huge (Down to 285 lbs, still big but losing weight!). Latuda + Zoloft for my OCD (I am Schizoaffective with bipolar subtype, and OCD). So how do i convince myself and understand that I am not Satan, Jesus, The President, a messenger for Jesus, Superman, etc. ???
Thanks in advance!
P.S. has anyone tried Sarcosine and had any luck with it?
A few people here have reported that their delusions about being god etc went away after about a year once they were stable on meds. That’s all I know.
Yes. I was raised Catholic Christian and they said things like “Do not masturbate or you will go to Hell!” Hahaha things like that. I was baptized, confirmed, receive the Eucharist weekly, received the Anointing of the Sick (Schizophrenia IS an illness), and I wonder if God is calling me to be a Priest or if i can just be like everyone else and find a beautiful woman inside and outside date her and get married and have 2-3 kids???
I will try the stop sign method. What I did was grab my head in agony and squeeze really hard and said “STOP THIS ■■■■ NOW!” and it is not working very well. It is like a racetrack going around in circles and it is like there is no end in sight!
Took me 3 1/2 years on meds. It was by finding a human power greater/more influential than myself and saying “I don’t want him as the messiah, why would anyone want me???” That helped me overcome it.
Cool thanks! I just need to stop thinking I have superpowers. Every boy and
girl has a superhero that they used to look up to, or still do, and so it’s
fantasy mixed with delusion.
delusions of grandeur are very beneficial in my case just like an antidote to depression and bad feelings. suddenly i feel glorious, every cell of my body is filled with rapture and I am very special.
The delusions of having super powers went away pretty quick with meds for me, but I still thought I was “better” than people till I completely crushed the delusion. Everything dissipated at once when I found the revelation that I wasn’t the messiah.
It’s not easy man!!! But I think these beliefs don’t last forever. I sure hope so. But only if youre living a really healthy lifestyle, then eventually you will overcome it with therapy, meds, cognitive improvement, etc… That’s how it worked for me. It’s a really tough thing to live with.
But the difference between you and me is I had almost no insight that what I was thinking was “bad”…at least you know its bad for you to believe. I synomousely started believing it was bad and had disbelief in the delusion at the same time. All of a sudden I was freed from the slavery of this belief all at once.
