I’ve been doing some head digging lately and came up with this idea that if your parents caused you severe abuse, both mentally and physically (including inflicting severe pain to your body). Wouldn’t that indicate that you as a person you are growing up in a permanent state of fear and paranoia? You are constantly paralyzed and petrified that anything you do could (and will) result in those actions again. And out of nowhere it happens again and again, day after day, year after year. Until they stop because you are no longer small child and they start fearing you now. But what kind of twisted individual one needs to be to act this way with kids.
Feel free disagree and I won’t challenge you on it, but I believe that this imprints on you as deep as your original language itself. I’m not going try to generalize and pretend that I understand how diagnosis works, but doctors themselves are students of discipline who are learning from patients and their experiences.
My case was that my mother was deranged banshee, and my father was washed up alcoholic. Thing is two of them went against me. While on top of my head I don’t remember my sister being beaten. Only I received beatings. I’m sorry for doing my laundry here, but I was just feeling like this was important for me to get this out of my system.
Don’t worry about it. That is what this place is for. I agree with you. It is striking how many pathological people have a history of abuse in their childhoods.
Yeah, it seems like a lot of us on the forum come from abusive childhoods.
I was abused every which way, unfortunately: physical, sexual, psychological, verbal, severe neglect (I was the stinky kid at school, for one). I’m dx’d with ptsd on top of my schizoaffective disorder.
I don’t claim to know how Schizophrenia comes to be, and I don’t fully believe that childhood abuse is in fact is the main and only factor how person comes around developing it. But I believe it’s a contributing one. Since depending from severity of abuse it can directly mirror those concepts of intense paranoia and delusions.
As an example healthy soldiers in World War One used to develop all kinds of PTSD since it was a complete mayhem. One I’m particularly interested in studying is term called “Shell Shock” when prolonged exposure to raining mortars used to break people. This still happening in adults today who are coming back from various military deployments and having to deal with debilitation afterwards.
The biggest thing I’m struggling today is actual vivid delusions and images that takes over my thinking, and it would normally happen by itself with no third agency present. And then people who constantly attacking you, CIA trying recruit you because they need another pawn that they could discard later.
I find isolation works best for me. Speedy recovery friends.