do you have to wait until you feel like it? I can do it on command within reason. But sometimes I don’t need to go or it’s just not going to go. 
Can you do a bowel movement on command or
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I can every morning when I wake up. Usually only have to go #2 once a day.
Do we really need to know this stuff?
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I can fart on command
Yes, it’s vital information for everyone’s benefit. 
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Guess I was running out of subjects to talk about. But I thought it was a bit better subject than my constant complaining about my past. Anyway, all public places have smells that indicate we all have asses. No hiding. 
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I have to wait until I feel it coming on. sometimes in the morning other times in the afternoon. it varies. just once a day. coffee used to get me moving, but it doesn’t do much to me anymore.
You’d be amazed how many customers go take a dump in the restroom at work. I can smell it all the way in my department. I can’t go unless it’s on the throne at home. Maybe it’s performance anxiety…
I would complain, but I knew exactly what I was clicking on… I was thinking that someone may have had a question about medication side effects, but I should’ve just left well enough alone.
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Well I wouldn’t want you to have an accident. When you gotta go you gotta go. I would go at work.
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In the morning I poop like three times then not again rest of the day.
Hm I’m not sure if i should comment here lol. I’ll just let u guys do the talking
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Everyone should make a point of going at work. After all you get paid for it.
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Yeah, my brain is like a drill sergeant in the marines.
My Brain: “You will defecate NOW. I command you to poop.”
Me: Sir, I can’t do it sir".
My Brain: “What is you major malfunction numnuts?! Did your mommy not raise you to be crap savvy.? Am I making you cry?”
"Me, “Sir Well, actually yes, sir.”
My Brain: I CAN’T HEAR YOU.!!
Me: “Sir, I AM CRYING, SIR”.
My Brain: “You’re so ugly you look like a modern art masterpiece. NOW CRAP, ON THE DOUBLE OR YOU"LL BE RUNNING FROM NOW TO SUNDOWN.”
And so on.
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Very true, but what would I read while doing the deed?
If you want a weird feeling next time you’re on the toilet pooping eat a chocolate bar at the same time. It’s an odd feeling but weirdly pleasurable.
I was unaware that people ate anything while sitting on the toliet.
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When I was a drunk I drank on the toilet. Not going to say how I kept myself from pissing in the bed. 
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