I’ve been stable on Invega 78 mg systenna with a few side effects. 40lb weight gain, derealization, low motivation and anhedonia (but from the medication). I don’t go in public because when I look in the mirror I look like a patient in the psych ward. Should I switch meds? Is it because I’m on the shot? How do u guys present?
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Difficult to say. I like to think I can pass as normal for a little while at least.
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I notice it’s always in the eyes. It’s one of the worst side effects if you’re looking at a full recovery
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i have tardive dyskinsia and akathesia from the meds so people often wonder why i shake or rock back and forth. sometimes i do it in public which embarrasses my in laws, they yell at me to stop all the time and there is nothing i can do about it. but i try they say it makes me look like i’m mental.
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Think I pass as normal on 10mg. And I’ve just started on 5mg now so see how I am in a month.
I also get hand shakes from the ap’s and pills. It can be very noticeable if I put my hands up to somebody else’s. I think that gives me away, but I just say, i drink a ton of caffeine. one time i put my hand in a circle with others and they were like why are your hands all shaky? i was like i drank 5 cups of coffee.
Other than that, I don’t think they can tell I’m specifically on ap’s
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They can tell when I’m not on them for sure
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How are your eyes? Do u just have dialated pupils? I just look like I only have 1 face for every reaction it fuxkingn sucks
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I feel the same, I feel like I’m expressing myself the same way regardless if I’m on meds or not. I feel like it doesn’t really help me…
I have dilated pupils, yes, but I have brown eyes so they’re camouflaged. I hadn’t thought of that…I am sorry if you have light eyes, that would be a give away…is there an eye drop that makes the eyes less dilated? That’s the only thing I can think of…
Have you tried acting? I also get flat affect, it also might be the sz, not just the ap’s, so I used to sit with a mirror and watch a movie, then mimic a facial expression i saw on the tv into the mirror to see if i could make my face scrunch up the same way. It worked pretty good. Multiple health professionals (a pdoc, 2 therapists, and 1 disability job vocationalist) said that they couldn’t tell i have flat affect and that I emote very well. but if i’m not making an effort, and i tell a sad story about myself, i get disbelieved because i’m so emotionless in voice and expression.
Practicing facial expressions in the mirror helped that happen less often, though.
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I don’t think they can tell that you are on medication but they can’t tell if you are ‘weird’ due to either the disease or the side effects (without meds you look either ‘spastic’ or ‘very quiet’, with meds you look simply ‘very quiet’). 
I have both dilated pupils and the poker faces and I’ve never been on APs…
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Light bright blue eyes here, they make me even more sensitive to sunlight too. I look like an opioid addict bc the dialation of my pupils except more of a zoned out look bc my eyes look distracted or something on invega. I just hope abilify is better- might be the shot bc u get it all at once…
i have brown eyes also, but don’t like the idea of acting too much. if it works for you, hey more props to you but its not my personal thing. I do smile a bit more in certain situations now(i realized)…and believe it has to do a bit with this site. Iam sorta realizing things…
okay, yea, i understand not everyone wants to make that kind of effort or feels “right” about play acting when everyone else isn’t.
It does work for me, though, and it helped me make friends, build a support network, and get like 3 jobs after college (I finished college after my sza diagnosis, so I transferred as an unofficial “acting” major lol )
I don’t know how you do it?! Congrats on staying involved. For me the invega makes me so depersonalized that even acting would feel foreign.
I get shaky and rock back and forth. My eyes are quite dull these days. Hoping a med change will change some of the symptoms
I don’t think people can tell. When I look in the mirror my eyes look normal, but in pictures they almost always look squinty,
maybe some professional would see that I am a mental patient, yes… Cause I have the typical belly of being on psychiatric meds plus my behavior outside remain odd… I am scared outside, quite cold plus if I am with my mom I talk strangely, like a kid a bit… but I guess the normies couldn’t see this.
I go off topic in conversation a lot and seem to be a little lost so likely people who converse with me know something is up. Plus I’m scared of strangers so if they talk to me I either mumble or I talk in an overly cheerful voice.
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My pdoc is thinking of switching me from Risperdal Consta to Invega Sustenna. I don’t want to gain any weight from the switch. So, I am hesitant to make the change.
I also rock back and forth sometimes unconsciously. People think it odd. They think I’m on some kind of medication that causes it but they don’t know what kind of medication it is. At least, I’m assuming that they don’t. They don’t say anything.
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