I have a blank mind. If I think of some thing it quickly fades away just like water drops evaporating from a heated vessel. Also if I think of some thing what thought before instantly vanished away just like overwriting.
I feel like me not fully awake. My awareness of surroundings, time all reducing at a steady rate. When I walk I feel like I pushing sleeping body with force so hands, head, eyes all feel like in sleep and I simply pushing so it appear like waking with sleeping body.
If I sit, stand, lay on bed etc I not even have awareness of it and even hours can get past even though I feel hungry, thirst etc. I need to manually force myself to stop standing, sitting etc otherwise it can continue for hours.
Vraylar makes me feel that way a lot, because it blocks a lot of the delusional thoughts I would be having otherwise. That part of it isn’t bad. The blankness in my case is absence of delusions. Takes getting used to. I feel like it is also a cognitive issue, so I play brain games, jigsaw puzzles, exercise, eat healthy etc. I am starting to feel well enough from these things to be able to focus on reading books again and remembering what I’ve read. I understand it can be worrying. But we can’t go back to the mind we had before. Just keep trying to do things to improve it now.
i have days where i have nothing on my mind, and then other days where i have an active mind. it comes and goes for me, haven’t figured out why yet. without meds though, i would have racing thoughts. and paralysis by analysis.
I not take any medications and still have blank mind. Its like a hypnotic trance. May be its a protective strategy to stop intrusive and other negative thoughts and ideas.
Its just negative symptoms, you can have them without being on meds but some meds can worsen them too. Idk if its permanent brain damage or if there is undiscovered science behind negative symptoms.