Haven’t updated you guys on my current job situation for the past 3 weeks so here’s the update. I started taking inbound insurance calls 3 weeks ago. Everything went smooth at first but then this past Monday I got a super hard customer who had to report an accident on her insurance. It took nearly two hours going back and forth with the customer and the body shop and the towing company and the company that owned the vehicle she hit. Somehow I made it through but was over an hour late headed to lunch. When I got back from lunch around 2pm I signed back onto my computer and immediately panicked. I ran out of the office cubicals and into the hallway and had a major panic attack. I couldn’t breathe, I was crying so hard I couldn’t see anything. People came and tried to help but they just made it worse then finally my manager shows up and gets me into an empty conference room. I was able to calm down but the paramedics got called and they showed up cause someone over reacted when I was saying I couldn’t breathe. The paramedics couldn’t find me cause I was just in the conference room with my manager. The onsite nurse did show up a little while after and she sat with me and talked with me for a while.
Everything that happened on Monday has led me down an anxiety spiral. In total this week I missed 22 hours of work out of my scheduled 38.75 hours. I exhausted my PTO and I had used my sick time back in October when I came down with Covid. I feel like I’m seriously in danger of being fired and I’m not even out of training yet(training is 12 weeks long) I’m going through their ADA accommodation determination company trying to get some accommodations. If they approve the accommodations I’m asking for it would get me out of the danger zone and could protect me in the future should I need more time off.
The plan is to request 24 hours off per month to be excused as intermittent leave as well as ask to work from home on a PRN basis. My job is hybrid work, some work from home and some in office. My goal would be to make it to where if I’m not feeling well on a day I’m supposed to be in office I can let my manager know then work from home without getting in trouble.
Everything has just started crashing down around me and I feel like I’m downing.
Being 100% honest if I lose this job it’ll be the end of me. I worked SO hard to get in with this company, applying 2 years in a row before finally landing a spot with the company. The pay is really good for entry level and there’s huge potential for advancement. My friend who works for the company has been there 9 years. I keep meeting people who have been with the company 15, 20 plus years. If I make it to my annual review I will get at least a 6% raise guaranteed. We also get annual bonuses, which I won’t be eligible for till I work an entire calendar year so I’ll get a bonus January of 2027 provided I’m still with the company.
Anyway thanks to anyone who actually reads this novel of a post.
I was wondering if you are supported to succeed with this job? I bit off more than I can chew also. But I realize people are totally supportive with me. People want me to succeed with whatever I want and need. @Hanna_Foxx
I agree with @Trooper, do you have, or can you get, a vocational counselor, therapist or case manager who can offer you support and advice about your job?
@77nick77@Trooper I see a therapist weekly and we talk about my job stress. She thinks I can overcome this anxiety with some more time in the job. But it’s hard I only have a session with her once a week. I might try and see if I could start seeing her twice a week.
My manager wants to see me succeed but idk if I’m really getting the support I need
People always have the potential to succeed. I use all my resources. Honestly including my faith. There are so many resources to help me take care of what I need to take care of. Sounds like you’re putting your all into this job. A commitment. My body has mental illness that gives me anxiety. I have anxiety also. I fear commitment and having things that need to be taken care of. Responsibility also gives me severe anxiety. I have trauma from my anxiety and it is a work in progress. I feel I have the chance I always wanted and needed. If my anxiety takes this away from me I will be devastated. It is not easy but I am managing. @Hanna_Foxx
I use my faith as a resource too! I can’t go much into detail cause I know we aren’t supposed to discuss religion on this forum, but to put things in simple terms I always say a silent prayer before I answer every call during my work day. I really think I just need more time in my role until I get comfortable
New jobs are hard and stressful. I would ask if someone could be your mentor to ease anxiety but you’re still in the training phase. When I was done training as an RN and was working on my own I had so many delusions and hallucinations it made it hard to work and it gave me some anxiety. It’s such a hard place to be in with everything invested and on the line. If you focus too much on everything it will drive you crazy. When you’re training the only thing I learned what works for me is to surrender to the process. This takes any ideas you have off of you. The old saying go with the flow is beneficial. Not overthinking is hard in the beginning phase of any job because you’re constantly double checking stuff and looking for assurance. You’re doing good. A lot of life is based on trying to figure things out. Your whole life you will be trying to figure things out. I’m committed to learning a bachelor’s level in philosophy by reading the books at home. Some of the books are boring, some are so technical that they go over my head you have to reread a paragraph a million times, some are easy reads, but I keep pushing through. I keep trying to figure things out. After this year I have a work flow when I read there’s no more resistance. Eventually things will be second nature at your job and work will bore you but for now try to take it easy and don’t be hard on yourself. Hang in there. Good things.
I don’t have any advice to offer you @Hanna_Foxx but I wanted to give you a hug and to say I am sending you my best wishes that you get through this grueling training.
That’s tough. I relate a little because I was getting so nervous at my job that for the first 2 months I would shake - literally. It’s now been 2.5 months and I’ve stopped shaking although I do still get nervous.
I hope you get accustomed to your job and that you end up liking it. And I hope you get accommodations
