I am back from holiday Thursday.
Before I went I was not doing so great.
The reality of going back to whatever you can call a normal life freaks me out
I’d planned to go cold turkey on all my meds when I get back.
I want to implode.
There is nothing keeping me here and I am sick of being kept sane for everyone else’s benefit.
I want hellfire to reign
Going cold turkey is not a good idea. 
Why do you want to quit your meds? It doesn’t make sense. Your meds are for you as much as they’re for others
I want complications that are dangerous
I will wait until I speak to the pdoc on 14th September
He will be informed that I refuse all their poison 
Why? What’s good about dangerous complications? Are you suicidal?
Yes that’s suicidal/depression.
I feel like there is no intrinsic value in being kept psychosis free
I want to tear the place up
This world is not for me
Not suicidal.
I need to ■■■■ things up beyond repair
I’d rather be catatonic than live one more day
It won’t really make you feel better to tear things up. If you need some kind of physical release, try exercise or tear up old, unneeded papers or punch a pillow. If you can afford one, buy a punching bag, hand it up and have at it.
Idk I see it as depression. Its like giving up on life.
I feel like that sometimes but talking to someone helps.
This is the problem
The pdoc will put me back on Zoloft just to shut me up
Call your doctor right now. Tell them you are having fantasies of violence. This is very serious.
There’s no shame in needing Zoloft
For me talking to my parents or friends helps. Even if its only online.
To be honest the mental health wards in prisons are not all that bad
Here it’s a better deal than what the general people have to face
I really really am not impressed
Stupid thing is I should be grateful for what I have, but I am not. I hate it
Should I have my mother on the phone to the doctor on the 14th?
I will not be as frank if she is on the call
Sorry everyone I know that we need to be recovery orientated but I feel it’s a lie
I am done with psych meds
Think about it, even the bit of life you have now you’ll loose it without meds.