Applications for jobs

I put out quite a few applications online for various jobs, and now I’m starting to regret it. I’m not sure i’m ready, mentally, for a job. I had extreme anxiety and auditory hallucinations at my last job, it was hell.

A part of me is ready for a job, though, and I’m sick of vegging on the couch all day. Quite the personal dilemma for me right now

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I am also in the process of looking for a little part-time work. I’m hoping to keep my health coverage and free travel on disability. I still experience depression and anxiety so I am not sure i am ready for a career just yet. I’m thinking I might get counseling. Sometimes I am called for an interview and I chicken out…

This is what i’ve done several times, too

The thing is I have to lie about what I’ve been doing for the past number of years because I have not been working due to mental health issues of one sort or another;depression, anxiety and finally schizophrenia for three years. So I say I have been a freelance copywriter for a web development company here in Ireland.

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I feel it’s impossible to avoid sharing/leaking details about the illness to an employer. I guess I could lie, but my social skills are so poor i feel like my coworkers will eventually catch on to my psychotic depression. I used to work 50 hours a week before I got ill, and I wanna make my own money again

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Don’t get me wrong, I’m pro-lying (about our illness, because stigma is lethal), but I’d at least make a paper/digital trail to ensure potential employers have something to look at if they need proof.

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You might be able to do it. My first job out of the hospital I was probably psychotic a large part of the time.
I was also addicted to crack for the last year. (I’m clean now). But I worked there for four years. If you find the right job you will succeed. The problem is that you don’t know when you start a new job if it is right for you.
But I’ve stumbled onto good jobs where I did very well. I always call it, “finding your niche”. If you find that job it is well worth the struggle.

If worse comes to worse you don’t have to follow through on those applications.

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I don’t know if I will get the same insomnia problems if I get a job. I still need to get one because I can’t live with my parents forever.

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For those that do work, do you find it easy to communicate and joke around with your co-workers?

I don’t chicken out at the interview, I chicken out when they call me in to work. I’m afraid I will lose my benefits. I’m on too many very expensive meds to lose my good medical benefits.

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