Schizophrenia.com

Anyone here got engage/married after being diagnosed?

I personally would love to get married but I can’t see it happening in the future but who knows…I have nv been in a relationship before,and I am 24 this year,how many of you got married or engaged after being diagnosed with sz?

I know a number of people who have gotten married and had children - here are some examples. You can read about their history at the links below, and see interviews with them at the videos below.

Bill MacPhee:
http://www.schizophrenia.com/New/Dec2002/szdigestDec02.htm

Fred Freese:
http://www.schizophrenia.com/newsletter/697/697overcome.htm

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I did get married when I was psychotic/delusional and deep into anosognosia. My wiffe suffered from mental illness as well. It did not work out, I have been divorced for several years now. No kids

I was diagnosed at 17. I was engaged after I got diagnosed at 22. We were very close to the alter.

But it wasn’t a healthy relationship and it ended when I was 24 and I decided I was done with drugs and alcohol and the girl wasn’t ready to give up the drugs yet. That ended the relationship.

It was a hard and dramatic break-up. But eventually we got out of each others life. I’m still clean and sober… and I found out this past year, she overdosed and passed away.

But now that I’m 29 and stable that window for close friendship/ could grow into something more… has been slowly opening up again.

I do have an Uncle who is Sz and he got married after he was diagnosed. Yes, he has kids. He’s divorced my Aunt in the height of his psychosis and remarried her again when he was stable. They are still married. My Aunt is amazing.

I know that I have the dream of holding my son’s child(ren) in my arms one day. He is 20. I believe there will be girl for him one day when the time is right.

I met my husband 3 years ago at the age of 38, he was 54 and slowly digging his own grave with a drug and alcohol addiction. Now we are both clean and sober and happy.

You have lots of time to find someone. :heart:

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I married my wife while diagnosed schizoaffective. We had been living together for 3.5 years. It was only just before she died that my diagnosis was changed , and we had been married for nearly 19 years.

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I was married for two years after dating a woman for three. It was a good time for me when we got together. Soon after the ‘I do’s’ I started to relapse (if that’s the right word). A year into the marriage I was completely lost in myself. I had tried my best to give my ex full disclosure, she even met privately with my doctor several times. Unfortunately she was not prepared for such a long and deep disconnect as I experienced. Looking back I still feel that I did her wrong. Hypothetical discussions and real life psychotic breaks are very different things.

I’m currently in a LTR but have no intentions of pursuing marriage again, ever. I think the least I can do is give my girlfriend the respect and the freedom to go without a long and painful legal process if she ever needs to. Love Bares All Things is a warm and fuzzy platitude. I would not put that kind of expectation, judgement, and guilt on her or anyone.

My wife and I both are schizoaffective and have been married for about 4 and a half years. One of the hardest parts for us has been finances since we are both on disability and there is a significant marriage penalty when it comes to trying to get extra help from medicare for prescriptions. We are very fortunate that we haven’t had to go on Medicaid yet but we do have to rely on a lot of help from our families.

So far our marriage has been pretty good for our mental health I think. We listen to each other and fight fair most of the time. Neither of us has been hospitalized for the past ten years we have been together.

If we could handle the stress of working things would be better money wise but we are not willing to risk losing what we already have.

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hey,

Yes. Met the girl here on the old chat server…A lot of people hooked up in that resource but unfortunately the powers that be couldn’t listen to the people who used the space and succeeded in letting the perverts in…shame really but dating sites on the internet are a dime a dozen these days…

Keep things on the downlow till you meet them… If your working it’s not so much a drama but if your not it’s problematic…be honest…I have a Unusual Brain disorder that requires medication…I’m honest but it’s cool to keep your diagnosis quiet till they see your a somewhat normal person…

On most dating sites people have baggage…that is a no brainer if you get to a certain age but honestly…most folks are pretty understanding if you pass yourself off as normal!

A friend in the struggle,

rogueone.

I was married for 25 years, being dx’d at the 10 year mark in the marriage.
Our divorce was final in Jan of 2012 and in Oct 2012 Married for a second time.

It’s only as difficult as you make it out to be.

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Never been in a relationship, haven’t had a girlfriend. Went on a date when I was 18 once, but it went awful, we just couldn’t talk to each other. The unfortunate thing was I had to stick with the girl for the rest of the date. I couldn’t just walk out as I had invited her to a party. It was my first and only date. I like to forget about it now, but in truth it has helped me develop a sense of humor.

Im 37 now and haven’t manged to lose my virginity either, but in truth I haven’t really tried to, other than when I was a teenager…I suppose the way you got to look at it, is that I wouldn’t have developed the good sense of humor I possess today if it wasn’t for ■■■■ like that, because in truth you gotta laugh at some things in life, because theyr’ll just hurt you otherwise.

as long as I’m not showing signs of schizophrenia and have a job I can date professional women that are also pretty. They never care when I tell them about my illness. Its looking like I’m going to be dating someone soon. I seem to conect better with people who have overcome a lot of hard times. Its when they are still messed up that I always am forced to bail. Both male friends and girlfriends.

I’ll be 25 this year, and while I’m not married or engaged, I’ve been with my boyfriend for 2.5 years now. I was diagnosed at 16, and he is very supportive, even when he doesn’t know what to do. I think it’s absolutely feasible for most of us to find love. Hang in there!

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My wife knew of my problems before we started dating. We got married and had kids and it nearly ended our marriage but I got help. It is possible but it is very hard, especially on the other person.

At times I feel I am a burden on her so I try to make myself better and do better around the house.

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How I wish I can do better and not depend on other to function,I am 24 this year and nv been in a relationship,it Is a disgust for me,hopefully I stay positive throughout

I had never been in a relationship, and only had 3 dates until I met my husband at 21years old. I had three older brothers who were very popular and I had vowed to never date one of my brothers friends, so it didn’t leave many guys to think about, but I was much too shy and introverted to even consider dating.
My second husband, I met while walking to the grocery store.
So just because you’ve never been in a relationship, never say never.
You have to remember though, potential mates wont find you if your hiding behind your living room door.
Get out to places you enjoy and chances are you’ll find someone with something in common.

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I also met my wife on this site on the former message board that evolved to this message board…we were together one year before we married and we just now got divorced four months ago…we were married six years and one month…I feel better about meeting someone now than before I was ever married…proved to me that it’s not hopeless to find a woman while schizophrenic…I am already talking with another woman on a date site, I don’t know if it will work out, but at least there’s a chance to keep me happy?

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She said she accepted me for who I was. Turned out she accepted me for what I had.
Now I’m happily divorced.

From the country Ridgerunner