An update for anyone wondering how its going

School and Work
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Tl;dr. Im tryna psyche myself to not quit, and giving an update

Im studying for five years to get an undergraduate plus masters via distance learning in one go.

One half of a year done so far. Currently averaging 60 to 70 percent in grade

Wanna apply for a distance learning phd at the institute of Cosmology and gravitation. Which will last anywhere between 3 to 6 years. (Would love to apply for Cambridge if i do well, but realistically idk if the negatives will allow me to work harder so it depends on karxt)

I canā€™t hold a job down much less manage a non remote phd. Unless karxt changes things. i dont think it will despite the high hopes i have for it knowing the mechanism of action

Whats the point of studying if i dont have a job as a teacher/researcher afterwards. I mainly wanna do research in atomic science or cosmological stuff. Teaching would be cool, but researching is cooler bc you get to play with maths to discover science

But yeah anyways, guys, keep trying with your goals. It doesnt matter what it is. Our cognitives deficits can be overcome and sedation and tiredness or avolition is hard to over come but you can use hobbies to feel more motivation to continue

Please done give up. Im telling myself the same thing right now.

To not give up and have hope. I hope this gives others some hope too. We can try to achieve more normality than the worst prognosis drs and nurses may push on us

:fire: :heart: :fire: :heart: :fire:

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well that must be roughā€¦I couldnā€™t do itā€¦I hardly did it before I was ill with sz. good for you manā€¦wow. smart guy. I believe in hope tooā€¦

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Thanks juke, im trying, cant say im smart but im definitely hardworking

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with a desire to learn the things youā€™re learning yes you are smartā€¦if I had to do engineering or any kind of science in college I had a very very hard timeā€¦kudos manā€¦you deserve it.

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Thank you juke, kinda need to hear its worth doing

Because its taking a toll - motivation wise

Thank you a lot, i really mean it, stress it a lot, youre making me try to convince myself to keep at it

Edit: i remember the past (failing at college level) and it makes me feel its not worth doing because of how much it takes out of you

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What undergraduate degree are you pursuing? What masterā€™s?

Donā€™t give up! I hope you succeed. You will be an inspiration to so many people if you stick to it. And youā€™ll be so proud of yourself.

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It was astronomy/astrophysics but i switched to theoretical physics

Idk, i feel i wont be proud of it. I feel like im only doing it because otherwise i feel like theres no meaning to me. But that feels like its not enough reason to put myself thru so much mental hard work

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any degree is daunting but especially your field of study it seemsā€¦perhaps get a successful degree in business or something you can make money atā€¦if I had it all over to do again I would be in construction management.

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I have a degree in economics but psychosis caused me to underperform.

Im not really interested in a career outside of academia. I like learning and presenting.

I guess i could always stop at the bachelors and go back to economics for a masters.

Psychosis isnt gonna effect my scores this time. I know that much.

If i go to economics. I could even do side consulting.

But like i say, it all depends on being able to sustain work, which is my biggest worry

Im not in it for money anymore - i realise my health and stress tolerance wont ever allow for it

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applekidd. thanks for the inspiration and kind words to us all here. best of luck to you!!!

judy :innocent: :blush: :star_struck: :upside_down_face:

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Thank you judy!!! Im hope it reads genuine :pray:

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I would at least finish your academic year. Decisions like changing programs canā€™t be made on a whim. Itā€™s common to have days you want to quit but the motivated persist through those days and continue.

I guess under pressure the truth emerges of how bad you want this degree.

Good luck! And if unsure, I would keep going.

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Thanks brotha :pray::heart:

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it sure does and it is beautiful. judy

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Honestly, I think being a hard worker is more important anyway; whether at school, at a job, or in whatever you do in life.

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thank you @Moonbeam thatā€™s what i need to hear. life is not about ā€œtalentā€, itā€™s about being disciplined in your interests and putting your all into it

<3

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Thanks a lot for your heartfelt words of inspiration and empowerment - it does encourage me to keep going with my dreams & projects too. I also wish you all the best with your studies and ā€” fingers-crossed ā€” future research :milky_way:

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I hope you stick with it for the enjoyment of doing something you love

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I agree with Johnathan I think youve gotta take your time with big decisions. Good luck man

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Thanks. Needed to hear that.

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