It feels like fate has just decreed that I’m not allowed to be on medication. My way out, my ticket to normality and enjoying life. I’ve not been on a single psychiatric medication that has not resulted in either extremely distressing or otherwise dangerous symptoms. My therapist wonders if I’m just very sensitive to chemical changes…anyways I’ve discovered that there’s a 90% chance that the reason why I’ve had an awful time with urinary retention lately is due to my Zoloft…the one med I thought I could trust…but sure enough my issue with it first started when I began Zoloft and got steadily worse as my dose increased, and now that my dose is higher than ever the retention issue is worse than ever. Going off it for a few days helped to relieve the issue. I am being forced to go off of this medication. I have no other choice. It has left me completely unable to sleep at night until I pass out from exhaustion during the day and sleep through my classes. Unfortunately people who experience this side effect from one antidepressant are likely to experience it from all, as the issue is they mess with seratonin, which helps with bladder contractions. I suppose I could try something like Wellbutrin, but that raises dopamine levels and my dopamine is already high from my psychotic disorder.
I feel like I’m cursed to suffer. Feeling pretty hopeless.
That sucks Anna… I’ve never had urine retention issues but it sounds very upsetting. I really hope you can find some medication that works for you. Don’t give up hope until your psychiatrist does. Hugs
That actually makes me feel a bit better, knowing it’s not just me. My therapist doesn’t seem to be very insistent on my staying on medication. She’s mentioned she’s of the opinion that you have to make a choice on whether the side effects are worth the benefit. Which I think is kind of lame because it’s like choose to suffer from medication or choose to suffer from your illness…it’s a lose lose either way…at this point I’m so tired of starting new meds only to deal with miserable side effects that send me reeling and affect my functioning as bad as an episode would…
I have no idea what to do. I’m very scared of going back off antidepressants. Even the few days I took off to experiment with if it helped my issue I noticed my thoughts and feelings of life being a prison creeping back in. Hwauaugh. At least my parents said they’re here for me no matter what.
