While I understand why the thread was shut down, think it may be useful to explore what happened. If others disagree, fine.
Might be a good question to ask yourself.
If you need an object to flame, flame me. I am perfectly safe to flame as much as one of your alters may wish because – after observing your posts for a while – I’m relatively sure I know what’s actually taking place.
I have been borderline and paranoid / delusional with sudden splitting off into displaced aggression and rage toward projections of my abusers who are not in fact my abusers.
I had to learn to observe to notice to recognize to acknowledge to accept to own my character disorders so that I could develop the mechanisms to deal with them effectively.
But first I had to stop denying that I was acting out toward the wrong people. I had to learn to direct the anger (however silently) toward those who actually did abuse me as a child.
I understand that that’s not always easy to do if the abuser was a trusted caregiver, but it is what will have to happen if one is ever going to get comfortable in one’s skin and stop blaming others for what one hallucinates they are doing when they in fact aren’t.
Got my fire suit on. Fire away.
Note: Edited out the user’s name from the subject line as he has stopped using it in public. Trying to respect his privacy.
(Wearing moderator hat)
How about we just pick me as the scapegoat? Or call these guys if you want to talk some ■■■■
This could have been handled via PM to daze. But I’d warn you to be careful what you say to that one.
Probably better handled at the forum level in my opinion.
Don’t mean to be dismissive at all, but… why? If one knows the other is mis-directing anger intended for others, what difference does it make? There’s no one on this forum who is actually involved in this. It’s all projection.
She might fall in love with you o_O
Not for at least two days. Account suspension for publicly attacking other users. Getting tired of mopping up spills in aisle three.
(Wearing moderator hat)
I’m having a hard time identifying who abused me. Am I in trouble?
Well were all in some kind of trouble.
But seriously schiz aside, she needs therapy to sort herself out. Sz is only half the problem. The other half, is not likely to be helped by this site , pointless waisting your breath.
From what I can see at this moment , it is only enabling.
That sounds just what I went through in my anger management therapies and classes.
The anger management was so important… for one… when I stopped acting out towards people who just met me and honestly wanted to help… (nurses… docs… case workers) things got easier for me.
The anger management also helped me battle my addictive personality.
I made my middle brother’s life such a living hell… that he told his friends I was dead and completely avoided all contact with me for many years. He wasn’t doing that to be mean… he was protecting himself from all the pain and bullying I did to him.
When I did finally get myself together and not blaming others… and trying to deal with my anger and paranoia in a more constructive way… eventually my brother and I began to mend the bridge.
I remember how off the hook my anger was… I was paranoid about my family… so I accused them of a lot of stuff… and worse…
Plus… I was so angry about stuff that had nothing to do with my family… but I blamed them anyway.
That only caused me to go homeless…
Yeah; one can definitely get the sort of productive insights you’ve gotten from doing AM work. I did two different t groups ('99 and '04), as well as I think three AM workbooks. I had to. The anger was not my fault, but I badly needed to get a steering wheel on all that energy.
It could well be that no one really abused you, of course. But a lot of us have trouble recalling who did what to who because sz can confound our memories so severely with delusions and hallucinations. I always knew my parents were reactively (rather than, say, “willfully” or “sadistically”) abusive. It was harder for me to clarify how what playmates and school chums had said and done did injury to my ego. But I knew that I was angry as h##l at the mental health establishment for “abusing” me via mis-dx and mis-rx… and spraying that frustration onto the wrong people.
I needed a lot of help sorting it out and then letting the steam out of the pipes. DBT, ACT, MBSR and the MBCTs in general have helped a lot to clarify the fuzzy memories and make them accurate so that I could do better (though still not perfect) with people in current time… and stop blaming them for what they actually had little to do with.
Hmm. Well, actually, the paranoid projections are a core feature of sz. I see that feature regularly expressed on the forum, though rarely as ardently as was the case yesterday. Most of the members here can chill at some point, probably because their anti-Ps kick in. One wonders if she is adequately dosed and/or continuously medicated, as well as regularly aware of the rage.
But I do agree that some anger management with mindfulness training, as well as some memory work and gentle exposure therapy seems indicated. (I wasn’t much “better” a few years ago. Sigh. And what I just ran down is pretty much what I had to do.)
You could also be projecting based on your experience of personality and schiz. gets confusing