This song, Stolen Dance by Milky Chance…the first time I heard it was in an art group at the psych ward…but when I listened to it…I felt I’d heard this song so long ago…it ties to me in some way…yet it’s not that old…produced in 2013…sings to my soul though. I don’t know what the hell it is with it…just brings me back to a place in time that never happened before.
I don’t know what it is whit it though…first time I heard it I remembered having heard it…it’s not old yet is…there’s a fear I have…that some of my delusions are real…and if so…I just want to, despite consequences, know the truth. The truth. The reality of my life. If I’ve lived some sort of alternate life in my past that I don’t or vaguely remember, I’d own up with proof. Just be human and own up to me I’d say.
maybe I’ll just let it drive me insane and become the only song I listen to…like everyone I come in contact with is doing at the moment. I’m a good guy okay? Curling up at the bottom of a bottle but yeah…have to go look up Lincoln Iowa if there even is such a place…human…what is that exactly at this point?
I used to think that too. I have a lot of dejavus. Like a lot.
But in all seriousness, I think we have that feeling because we don’t really want to deal with the life we do have. We want some magic and some nice stories and something else than to accept we have an illness that messes with our minds.
I’m sorry, it’s not pessimistic, but it’s not a delusion either… this is the only life we have just because we’re living it now and we are all positive we’re going to die someday.
Just make sure you take the best out of each moment.
I want to say…Vermont for some reason. Vermont. Kill me. I’m a good hearted person and it’s impossible…okay? impossible. If half of what I remember is true…own up…hate to say…man up…face me…word to word,…face to face. Talk mother******'s…TALK.
I have a playlist of all the songs that I thought people were communicating to me through and vice versa before I was medicated. I no longer have this delusion. But that was actually a rather interesting part of my illness. I still listen to the songs and reflect on what I was thinking back then when I heard them. Here’s the playlist: