Schizophrenia.com

A negative post - my apologies

Yeah I used to spill out bullsht all of the time, especially in my 20’s and 30’s. I used to not think much and talked - saying things that were not so important - talking about myself alot and not really placing a lot of thought when I spoke.
My conversations were one sided and it was all about me and my hollow accomplishments.
Today I am a lot more cautious before I say something, usually - especially out in public.
I am not going to bullsh
t others by talking about trivial non important things like the weather or I usually dont tell them “how are you doing” when in reality, i could care less - I am not going to say nice false things to others.
If lets say I was buying my groceries and a cashier asks me “How are you this morning?” I will usually respond by saying “fine thank you” sometimes I will lie and say " fine thank you - how are you doing this morning?" Honestly I could care less as to how they are doing, but I guess i am always polite. I really just want to be able to buy my groceries without saying a word - and I usually do not initiate conversation, I usually politely respond to what they are saying or asking me.
There are plenty of phony conversations out there - plenty of bullsh*ters talking out of thier a**holes - If I say something I want it to actually mean something - I really want to be genuine. Staying true to myself is more important than spilling out phony lies - I like to keep things short and simple when dealing with the public

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Well, have you ever heard of an awkward silence? I think that’s where a lot of talk comes from. When I walk into the gym it’s always a “Hi, how are you?” It just means I notice you are there and I am here.

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They don’t care either, greeting customers is just part of their job. If you don’t want to talk, then don’t.

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Well if I do not respond to them that would be awkward - I mean I do want to be polite, I guess i really don’t like to make conversation with the general public. I mean if I get to know someone, that would be different

Well, you have to start somewhere !

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Yeah lol - I guess you have a point. But like Malvok wrote, they are being ‘friendly’ because the managers tell them to do this, it is part of the job

I think that being expected to make polite conversation with strangers makes a lot of people uncomfortable (I know it makes me dumbstruck) and silence even more so to most people, so people who work with the general public sort of get in this routine of brief and superficial conversation. I don’t like it either, it makes me uncomfortable, but it doesn’t really bother me to say “fine thanks, how are you?”

I say hello, how are you when I go into the post office or other buildings. I have to, so I can avoid the metal detector line (sometimes I just cut a bunch of people like today). If I know the guards I just go around. It’s natural for me to say hello, because I was raised in an office setting. I used to spend my summers as a kid there.

I used to work in retail where you’re supposed to say hi.

Having a problem with it is definitely a good topic to bring up to a therapist. It shouldn’t be upsetting. It’s not bs. It’s social lubrication.

Nevermind - had a bad experience with the stores pharmacy dept lately - I am not a happy camper - I will get over it, sorry about the negativity - One of those moods

No you are right @metime it is healthy to be social - just am upset with their pharmacy - they were short of some tablets - like 5 pills and they said they would call me up when the rest of the pills came in - its been about a month now and no phone call - I switched pharmacies - I am just in one of those moods - not really like me

For my whole life now I have opposed by the MOB.

(M)ountain
(O)f
(B)ullsh_t

You were just venting. I understand.

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Not only that but I was not in the right frame of mind when I wrote this - a dip in my mood

That might be true with some people - but many others take that type of job because they like people and they like interacting with a lot of people. I know people who really enjoy this type of job and have a genuine interest in other people.

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Yeah you are right @SzAdmin I did not have such a good moment when i wrote this - I still have some faith in humanity
Can you delete this post? If you dont mind

“words are pouring out like endless rain into a paper cup” (Beatles)

There is that rain caught in the cup.

You had reason. Nobody can trust pleasantries if they are being ignored about what is important.

Yeah, they slither while they…

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Hey. Don’t worry about it. It’s like how the college I’m in now stabs you in the front. The first college I was in stabs you in the back, because the people are just so polite and completely misinformed. I was told once that I could sign a form to not have to get vaccinations. Then they wouldn’t accept the form. So I had my classes purged twice. It was a mess.

EtA: You just had to deal with the back stabbing variety.

Its great that you are going to college - do you have a major?