Thinking about love

What do you suppose love is?

Not the romantic kind. I’m trying to figure out if I love my friends or not. I always felt you knew you loved someone if you would die for them. I knew I would die for my family if need be. I don’t think I would die for my friends. But that’s because if I died my family would be devastated and I care too much about them to do that to them. Which made me think maybe I need to redefine my definition of love given that I fantasize about dying on a daily basis anyhow.

So then I thought maybe my definition of love should be whether I’m willing to live for someone. I live for my family and God, so I must love them. I would not live for just my friends, if I had only them and no one else. But does that mean I don’t love them? Or does it just mean that my pain is stronger than my love for them, but not stronger than my love for family and God?

I think I really do care for my friends a lot, which is a bit of an alien feeling to me in regards to people outside my family. I don’t usually care so much about non-family members as they are transient whereas family is forever. But I realize I really do care for my friends now. And maybe that is all it is, a genuine affection and warm caring, and not quite love. But I am not so sure what love is, so I can’t be certain.

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Love is self-surrender and learning to let go.

“I have decided to love. If you are seeking the highest good, I think you can find it through love. And the beautiful thing is we are moving against the wrong when we do it, because John was right, God is love. He who hates does not know God, but he who has love, has the key that unlocks the door to the meaning of Ultimate Reality.” - Martin Luther King Jr.

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i have never really understood love so i don’t use the word often and every friend i have had has either been basically like family to me or someone who i am cool with but don’t really care for, it is mainly like this because i am not very good at making friends, but my family i say i love them because that’s what i have been taught to know, i can be brutal at times when it comes to love because my mood changes a lot and i say things that hurt peoples feelings and make them cry. i don’t know why i do these things but i also don’t know why people hurt me and than expect me to love them like i don’t remember the things they have done to me a long time ago, it may be that since the voices i used to hear would always sound like everyone around me hates me and i would hear them talking about me and saying things about my thoughts and i really cant control my thoughts they are probably worse, but because of this i don’t think there is anyone i would die for mainly because i feel like no one loves me people just want to use me and see me be successful only if they had something to do with me getting to the point of success, it is just one of those things for me where i can say there are certain people i love and dont love but i dont really know what i mean when i am saying that.

I would like to share these scriptures from 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

4 Love+ is patient*+ and kind.+ Love is not jealous.+ It does not brag, does not get puffed up,+ 5 does not behave indecently,+ does not look for its own interests,+ does not become provoked.+ It does not keep account of the injury.+ 6 It does not rejoice over unrighteousness,+ but rejoices with the truth. 7 It bears all things,+ believes all things,+ hopes all things,+ endures all things.+

:smile:

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I think love for a person is unconditional, you are willing to give without expectation of whats in it for me, accept the person for who they are, challenge each other to be better persons and at life. You don’t really have to be in love with a person to die for them, I think most people jump into action to save others in a emergency type situation.

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If you can imagine to live without them I would consider it as an “attachment”, however if you can’t imagine that, it’s love. There was a quote for this but I forgot.

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My .02 - there’s different types of love, and we could fill textbooks with the different labels i.e. Erotic love, romantic love, friendship love etc.

I know personally that I have a lot of friends that I know I love. My brothers and sisters whom I served in the military with. I know they have my back, and I’ll always have theirs.

There’s even friends I’ve met online that I love.

It’s just the different love-types have their different standards and expectations.

I am sorry, I hope this all makes sense. I am sort of “scatter-brain” today.

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If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. And if they don’t, they never were

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It was not that quote but that sums it up really nice :slight_smile: just another point of view :wink:

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A poem I wrote as an act of love for a friend:

What do you suppose is the smallest
unit of love?
Is it a hug, a snog,
or a bug in a rug?
Can a smile to a stranger
on the street
who really needed it
be an act of love?
What do you suppose is the grandest
gesture of love?
Can a gesture like dying
with accompanied crying
be an act of love?
What would love look like
without acts
without gestures
without hugs?
I will look for a bug
in a rug for you
and when find one I do
I will ask the truth.

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Having gratitude for things and life opens your heart up to more love.

Also if you rub your hands together and hold them palms up and you notice the tingling, that’s supposed to open your heart chakra

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It’s worth looking up the four kinds of love in Greek. It gives a lot of insight (in my opinion) into what love really is.

Agape and Eros is all I can remember!

And philía, and storgē.

You’ve made me want to look into these again! :slight_smile:
So I shall do that lol

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That is so precious oh my lord :heart_eyes:

Loves still worth fighting for or is that a naïve statement? I don’t think it’s naïve :heart_eyes:

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I don’t think I ever really understood this. Let them go? What does that even mean? Are you holding them captive somewhere?? :cold_sweat:

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… Are you satisfied with them existing exactly as they are with all their differences and flaws.

Do thoughts of them make you happy? I mean at the end of them pissing you off are you happy with them being here?

Then yeah… you probably love them.

I love a lot of people that way… Loathe a lot of others… but surprisingly most of the folk who I’ve wound up getting close to over time I’ve come to love.

Humanity is a confusing mess filled with many people and many perspectives… the friends we have are the only real window we can know into what else might be going on.

In this I find most all of them appreciable… even if they put me through hell or prompt me to put myself through it… it’s almost always something I grow from.

That said… the only real advise to making ■■■■ smooth in the perspective of all people being cool… don’t let anyone use or beyond that abuse you…

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Love is just like, only stronger.