Hi @Anna1
It’s nice to see you 
Hi wave, thanks 
I still cant think i find… I realize this only per some seconds of sanity lol… I just thought today, how i killed my sick brain with all the weed that i smoked in isolation… I should have seek help before this… but anyway… We have a tough family story, i told it to you…
Wave, i am still without depakote and its different… I have less my body pains, maybe more energy and less dumb ideas… But am still in suffering sometimes… Idk why this illness hit me in my thinking… idk…in the emotions too, yeap…anyway…
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What is your diagnosis under your current doc? The one you feel doesn’t fit.
With my current psychiatrist and therapist it’s bipolar disorder.
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Oh okay sorry to hear that. I had that diagnosis for 15 years, but when I started believing things that weren’t true and hearing voices they changed it to schizoaffective. Haven’t had anybody disagree with that yet.
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Its possible with partial agonists like Abilify, Rexulti, Vraylar and maybe others. Partial agonists gave me worse issues than negatives so stopped Abilify. For most ppl it won’t give issues though.
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I know right? I feel insulted when they suggest that I have Bipolar. Only 1 doctor out of many suggested that, but it turns out he’s alright. I figured they do that to ween people off disability, but I’m just a small fry and I don’t think he gets a kickback.
I am not saying BP peopled don’t suffer. It’s rare in my opinion when they cannot work and have a really bad case. It’s case by case in my opinion.
I’ve been diagnosed mainly with schizoaffective disorder because I improved from plain old schizophrenia. I also have mild Aspergers and other symptoms.
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So you think going from sz to sza is an improvement?
I always wondered what’s worse, having unstable emotions from sza or no emotions at all from sz.
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I have predominately negative symptoms and just delusions as a positive symptom. My meds help but don’t get rid of the weird thoughts and beliefs or the negs like cognitive decline and lack of motivation.
Some schizophrenics have minor negatives and their positives are treated well with APs.
In general, I think schizophrenia is worse than schizoaffective. I think the prognosis is worse.
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Yea that was my feeling and it makes sense. Having emotions, even bad ones, is better than having no emotions at all. Last time I said sz is worse than sza I got attacked here.
I have schizophrenia with severe negative symptoms confirmed by 8 psychiatrists.
I stay in bed all day everyday, only get up to eat and play video games 1-2x a week.
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Are you able to live independently?
I never was, I was still with my parents when I was diagnosed at 21 y.o, I never lived independently. I am 30y.o. and will be living the rest of my life with my parents. My brothers will take care of me after my parents die, one will never get married and will live with me until I die.
The other will get married to his gf soon.
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No, I live with my mom, brother, and step-father. I am on a waitlist for an apartment that is cheap and nice, but it’s like a 5 year wait list in california and I’m on year 1.5. There’s a shortage everywhere in california. That and I wouldn’t be surprised if I turned it down because I cannot function on my own. I would try it though just to see. Before the schizophrenia, I lived independently 500 miles away from home while in college. I lived in a dorm and a cooperative with 150 people…
I think people have it worse than me because we are considered high functioning because we can use computers and the internet.
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Ikr Many szics are homeless forever, some catatonic living in mental hospital forever and some commit suicide.
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I would be homeless if I don’t take my pills or without my parents.
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I don’t live independently. I live in support housing.
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yeah my current pdoc said she didnt think i was schizoaffective cuz I was quite high functioning. She said her schizoaffective patients were quite low in functioning.
but if I came in during an episode she probably could have a different opinion. its just currently i have no episodes.
im sure its all a blend on the spectrum. you can have bipolar and have hallucinations, you can be sz without hallucinations. Its all just labelling for prescribing medications.
im in the grey area of functioning enough. days where im pretty normal but days where im just splat. So I wouldn’t qualify for disability or anything. just gotta slug it out.
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you could try a group home?
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I need someone to push me to bath and take care of myself. I can’t handle living on my own. My parents help me.
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@Aziz, I insist that having extreme, unstable emotions with sza is worse than sza with no emotions. I say this because I’ve had both for extended periods of time and there is no comparison.
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Having no emotions is much, much preferable to having suicidal emotions 24/7. I know. I’ve had both for many years.
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