When You're 'Too Functional' to Have Your Mental Illness Taken Seriously

Health and Recovery
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I’ve read countless articles, many on The Mighty, about the struggle of having an invisible illness and the way other people judge the “validity” of people’s conditions. I’ve also read about people who aren’t taken seriously when they express their most intimate, dark thoughts to family, professionals and friends.

I’m a psychologist. Not too long ago I was reunited with many other mental health workers (psychologists, psychiatrists, researchers and professors were in attendance.) The event was a presentation of a type of therapy and when the speaker began talking, he asked us how mental illness affects a person. Someone answered a person with a mental illness has difficulties and struggles with certain areas of his life. Another person answered that the mentally ill suffer greatly. And then a third person said mentally ill people don’t function in society. I was waiting for someone to refute this, but instead everyone nodded and the speaker actually agreed and said “very good.”

My heart was beating really fast. It was partly because I didn’t know these people very well and I was struggling a bit with social anxiety. I hadn’t contemplated speaking up. But my heart was also beating fast because I was angry. That statement and the fact it wasn’t even questioned is exactly the reason why “high-functioning” people with mental illnesses are sometimes not taken seriously.

I can be dying inside while going through the motions of the day. It’s not difficult for me to know how others expect me to act. Acting fine is a cognitive process. You can probably mention right now how an emotionally stable or “mentally sane” person is supposed to act. It really is simple. A generally accepted lifestyle is one where a person wakes up every day, looks presentable, takes care of stuff that needs to be taken care of, eats and goes to sleep. This can sometimes be done regardless of how you feel inside. To say it’s difficult is an understatement, but it’s not impossible.

These “high-functioning” people don’t do it because they want to fool others, they do it because they want to produce and be a part of society. They try so hard to beat their illnesses or disorders. They don’t want to rely on others to take care of them.

So when a “high-functioning” person asks for help or admits to himself and to someone else his struggles, it takes a lot of bravery. These people have worked every single day to build a “normal” world for themselves are terrified of admitting mental illness, and when they finally do and are met with rejection, little understanding and no empathy from a mental health worker, it is devastating.

My compromise with my career is very clear to me, but I have to admit I have been blessed (and cursed) to see this because I, myself, struggle with my own disorders.
If you struggle with not being taken seriously, my advice to you is to trust you know yourself so much more than anybody else. Nobody has the right to undermine your difficulties. If they do, it’s their issue. Keep looking for the person who listens to you and takes your feelings into account. Don’t feel demoralized or flawed. I know it’s a tough pill to swallow when you ask for help from a mental health worker who should be able to understand you but doesn’t. Again, this is a flaw in their own understanding of the human mind.

By the way, yes I did speak up. With a bit of a red face I refuted what they all agreed to and told them it’s a terrible mistake to discard the presence of a mental disorder in relation to the functionality of a person. I added functionality is sometimes a symptom, depending on the illness and the person.

The speaker didn’t know what to answer, so he agreed and moved on.

https://themighty.com/2017/01/high-functioning-social-anxiety-mental-illness/

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i watched star trek today

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that was way too long to read but I get told all the time that I’m not psychotic.
I am however majorly depressed and suicidal because I constantly think that I’m losing my mind. I would have to tell the doctor that I planned on harming myself to get admitted. Yet even though I’m not psychotic I also can’t function.
Its a lose lose situation

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It will improve with time. My voices have improved with time. When I am out of the house, I don’t hear them at all.

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thank you
12121212

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These “high-functioning” people don’t do it because they want to fool others, they do it because they want to produce and be a part of society. They try so hard to beat their illnesses or disorders. They don’t want to rely on others to take care of them.

Yes that would describe myself. I am stubborn as heck and it takes a lot for me to ask for help.

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I spent most of my normal, functional life with acute anxiety, panic disorder, PTSD and depression and yet I walked the walk because society expected me too. I was also very pretty, fit, intelligent and articulate as well. I didn’t ‘look’ like an abuse survivor or a mental patient. I once told a coworker I was a survivor of abuse and she actually rolled her eyes at me and sarcastically said “Ya…you ‘look’ like you were abused.” I hid my pain for decades. That was when I was ‘normal’. Then, a year and a half ago I had my first psychotic episode and after a few dx they have settled on Delusional Disorder. It is disabling and yet, to talk to me, I am totally fine! You’d never know. I can’t work because of my illness and yet I actually had someone say to me “Has anyone ever told you to just get your shyt together?” I get very little compassion and empathy because I am articulate and functional. This hits home with me big-time.

Ahhh well…I could ramble on and on but I understand this to a T. I have been treated prejudicially my whole life ,even when I have tried to reach out for help, because I am just too functional and don’t look the part. I was almost treated as though I don’t have feelings at all, let alone mentally ill. Sad.

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I’ve lost count of the times I’ve been told, “you were obviously misdiagnosed.”

:unamused:

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This force is strong: for many functioning is equivalent with symptom severity. No need to assess them independently, such a thought goes. If one manages to achieve or function at a certain level, it follows without exception that we’re dealing with mild symptoms or indeed, a misdiagnosis all together. This is to say someone is exaggerating their subjective experiences in reporting them, which questions someones sincerity and is not a nice thing to do. I might be guilty of this way of thinking as well sometimes, through applying the equivalence the other way around. In the sense that I sometimes understand only with difficulty how a relatively mild symptom like the occasional hallucination can really disable someone’s functioning. I do believe its a confused way of thinking, and should be overcome.

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For me It’s the attitude of “You’re intelligent, so we’ll dismiss the possibility of X”. The follow on from that being to suggest you are just awkward/lazy/passive aggressive etc.

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Yes my functioning made it difficult to get support from my parents at first. They had this image in their head that the mentally ill were all homeless unkempt people muttering to themselves, which is just not true.

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my in laws think i’m more functional than i really am.

my dad got diagnosed about 4 years ago with schizoaffective disorder. he takes meds now but at first it was very difficult to get him to get on meds. anyway he has been trying to get social security for about 10 years for his COPD and now his sza but he keeps getting denied.

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I am having this problem right now. My team thinks that I’ve improved greatly since my last hospitalization last September, my OT thinks I’m ready to join a group or go register for a class.

As much as I’d like to do so, I know I haven’t recovered to the point where I am able to do these things just yet.

The only reason I’m keeping it together is so I don’t stress out my family, I feel like I have a duty to be as functional as possible for their sake (they have health problems too)

Its kinda annoying.

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I understand completely. I have schizophrenia and I am labelled “high functioning” because I no longer have the delusions or hallucinations. I also keep myself neat and tidy in appearance. I’ve noticed cognitive problems creeping up like not being able to watch tv or read a book. My psychologist did a cognitive assessment on me and of course I’m functioning at or above my cohort. I found that the test was not representative of what one faces in one’s normal environment. In short the test was too easy. I am very frustrated by this and I’m hoping that my new psychiatrist will take me seriously.

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Being in the ER after my last meltdown, I don’t think the head psychiatrist took me seriously. It would have been nice if they had kept me for at least a week. Yes, I’ve had this problem, too!

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i dont normally read long posts but i put more effort into this one because i like what you are saying and you are right when you say that we work hard every day to try to maintain or mental health, we try our best to fit in and be part of society, its not fair those people writing us off like that.

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Reading this makes me feel very, very good. I’m new to this world of mental illness, I was diagnosed with delusional disorder just three months ago, in november, but I wasn’t told until the mid of dicember. It was hard to accept, especially with risperidone killing my in every possible way (very, very bad side effects). It strikes me now every day as a bitter surprise to see that I’m low functioning (I was an overachiever, not to drag, but I really achieved everything I said I wanted to achieve) right now, because I was really high functioning.

I love what you posted because it makes me see that I’m not that low after all. That perhpas there is some chance for me to get back to my previous level and set my standards as high as I got them before.

Thank you for the post. We all want is to be functional members of society. Now I see that mental illness is totally misunderstood, and a lot of people suffers because of it. I highly wish for this to change, and people like you are those who make the change possible.

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Yeah I coined a term “intrastigma” for being too hot ■■■■ for this place and too sick ■■■■ for that PhD program.

Sucks.

■■■■■■■ politics anyways. Don’t play their game and write articles, that is what they want, to feed you ■■■■■■■■ and let you look like a clown writing about it. Just go live, living is the best revenge. The joke is on you if you think political games like elitist journals are gonna get anything done. They don’t.

I did a thesis and was in a doctoral program in clinical psychology. I graduated college top of my department and went on to graduate school. I got called in for being intimidating to other students. Well if you cant look at a sick person play your stupid game with more skill and finesse, you have no business being called doctor. Doctors dont just look at sickness, they treat it, investigate it, and try to cure it.

Like I hope it makes people sick, it is the reality of what people think is so mysterious and fun to read about.

Just because you are schizophrenic doesnt mean you are stupid.

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I’m certainly considered high-functioning, but the struggle is real. Sure, I work five or six days a week, but people don’t see the hell I go through inside to do that. I don’t have any choice. Most people who hold conversations with me wouldn’t know I’m sick at all; I’d say I hide it well.

My dad would be an example of a person who didn’t take my illness seriously. I was always considered gifted, limitless potential, and he didn’t understand why I was unable to live up to it. As the years went by, it became clear that he was becoming more and more disappointed in me.

I swear that half of my family would disown me if I went on SSDI, or at the very least they would think much less of me. My sister, a nurse who sometimes takes care of sz’s and sza’s, is about the only person in my family who would still be proud of me.

Just because I’m able to hide it doesn’t mean that I don’t struggle like hell.

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I read @walkers post, and the word that came to my mind is stereotype.

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