I’m having inner conflict. I want to exist. The inner conflict is, I find myself in positive existence as well as negative existence. As I want to exist, I am sure that it must be positive existence. Is negative existence due to unsuitable environmental factors, lack of ability, due to my ill health and, is it also due to ill decisions piling up? Or is it chance not working for me? Can negative existence cease to exist? Is negative existence due to social order, desires and, expectations? I know that Life is unlimited, Life is an individual and, Life is always a different key in any different event and, I find co-existence very very puzzling and extremely difficult. So, is negative existence the result of external conflict and or external influence? If inner conflict is both imaginary and real, is the inner conflict an imaginary prerequisite to stop negative existence from becoming a reality? I find inner conflict to be a bundle of contradictions that is plaguing me and, I want to ask, whether it’s just a difference of opinion, or it’s just finding ourselves to be different lifeforms with different responsibilities living under the same hood with expectations and dead lines to meet. What about age, unthinkable sex and, horrific death playing their vital role in causing inner conflict, which is found to be unspeakable horror? What if my own existence is a contradictory creation of science and technology? Am I the only one having such questions? Are my very own questions the abode of conflict? Is the inner conflict the sole result of outward appearances and influences or is it competition for sex and better life? If I’m nothing but an abomination should I find myself in a cocoon only to change for a better future? Is inner conflict a reality only because of presence of differences in riches, communication, opportunities, challenges, tragedies, results and expected results? Is inner conflict due to finding life in wrong and or not required events and also due to not finding life in right events? If there can only be a single winner, is inner conflict all because of such a result? Who is causing inner conflict if the source is nothing but external? Is it innocence or an accident or an unfortunate event or is it a possibility that must be helped with or to be ignored? What if it is intentional, can it be surmounted or ignored altogether? Now, I understand that the inner conflict is my sole responsibility and I must never entertain it and must prepare to combat it and hope that it is not from an external source and if it is indeed external it must be manageable. I must never find myself begging to end the inner conflict but, co-existence itself is nothing but taking, inheriting, sharing and begging. I’m sure if I learn better English, invest time, put effort and get creative, then more of information will flow through, all about inner conflict and nothing more, nothing less. I think it’s time I somehow magically find myself without inner conflict and to live with and around positive existence and positive existence alone. May inner conflict rest in peace. For now, I’m an immortal in this event because the code that governs the World has revealed itself whether I deserve it or not. Thanks.
My Bhai @anon93437440 is Immortal soul…!!!
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Hey guys why am I not getting any replies? So far not helping… Are you reading or not? Care to reply?
For life that can distinguish Heaven and Hell, absence of inner conflict proved absence of Heaven and Hell and, the presence of the promise of well being and, when the inner conflict appeared life felt the presence of anti-life and an unending identity crisis.
This is Earth’s History. This is why war continues. To win the war is to end the inner conflict once and for all.
So, who is the worthy winner carrying the burden of memories, if any. If character is destiny, then me vouching and longing to be that winner appears to be full of identity crisis.
For war is contradictory and the result unknown. It clearly shows that the World never questions life that resides in it, it is the life against life that fights the battles for some sort of possession.
As both good and evil are nothing but relative in nature, we must find absolute good but not relative life that fluctuates between good and evil.
Is absolute good a reality? Does this make any sense? The only question is, why do I continue to pursue a better life for myself? What is my purpose? If it is not me, then who? And, let us not end it abruptly, shall we?
No, I’m not ready. Sorry. And, this text is creativity that comes with inner conflict. I must end inner conflict before it ends me. Living is all I do.
- Sagar Gorijala.
Guys please do reply with your comments below, for your comments are my bread and butter for the ongoing thought process.
Block text is too hard to read
The option to edit is no more. Can you please copy paste text else where and hit enter to separate the text where ever necessary to make it more easier and comfortable to read? Thanks.
I added some paragraph breaks for you.