me and you both!
yeah Iām the same way, I may hear a word or two or an odd placed sound that shouldnāt be there but rarely hear outter voices which is hard to explain to someone who doesnāt know much about Schizophrenia. I think the average person thinks itās all outside your headā¦to me a hallucination voice is one I cannot control, if I donāt like what itās saying I canāt tell it to shut up and it goes quiet, I think/say shut up and it keeps going. I canāt tell when it kicks in (i.e. if iām working on writing I can think negative things on my own but then after hearing from others that itās okay I can change that point of view and think itās okayā¦but then thereās this other voice separate of my own telling me it sucks, even when others tell me its okayā¦if that makes any sense.)
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I was never able to explain to people how you can hear things inside of your head that seem louder than anything you have ever heard outside. I suppose you can say I am in remission currently, but I have lingering symptoms (not actual positive symptoms, more of a brain structure/thought process thing). I remember the peak of it very clearly. Itās painful, but yet itās inside. For me it turned to pressure, then pain, and as things progressed I would hallucinate in ālayersā - chatter/voices + loud music + random screaming all at once.
Our brains are structured differently, and so I feel that ordinary things that apply to any of our senses cannot be analyzed or described with generic terminology. I knew the difference between an inside and an outside voice, yet I didnāt truly believe many of them were either inside or outside, sort of this alternate plane. Makes things lovely to describe to those who try to help treat you.
My voices are for the most part only Inside, but occasionally I will hear cussing coming I from nowhere directed at me, but very rare
my spirits talk to me though, only when I am most volunerable.
Inside or outside, itās always negative, that being accusations or anything that will drive you nuts or make you miserable. You can end up feeling like a bloody ping pong ball being directed one way then another, then another, round and round in a complex manner until you are exhausted.
Itās like a very dedicated no win situation dedicated by a very heartless obsessive source.
Right now I have my ear buds on and am listening to birds on my old MP3 player.
Sounds a heck of lot better !
I downloaded a bunch of āNatural Soundsā and loaded my MP3 player with a most of them.
Some of the other good ones are the sounds of lake shores mixed with wildlife sounds or others you hear ocean waves etc.
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I donāt understandā¦ how were you guys diagnosed without āoutsidesā voices? I thought they had to be outside in order to pass as a hallucinationā¦ 
I made this topic a few days ago
yeah me tooā¦