I keep on having dreams I am in hospital or mentally ill. Once a week or fortnight at least. This morning I had two dreams - one where I was in hospital and too sick to leave. And the other was a strange psychotic dream in which i hallucinated a small black dog which followed me everywhere, even past closed doors. I was talking to my husband in the dream and suddenly saw this black dog and asked him couldn’t he see the dog? He didn’t. I knew in my psychosis i needed to go to hospital again.
Its bloody crazy that I am having so many mental dreams. Once i had two in a row one morning over two years ago, and within a week i was in hospital for real. I hope for my husband’s sake it doesn’t happen again! Its like i’m going mad or something!
I’ve been doing well, Alien still inserts thoughts into my head, but I am used to him, he will never leave me. Hubby asked if i want to increase my meds, but i said i am doing fine on 200mg amisulpride, which i have been taking for nearly a year now.
My laptop crashed a week ago, took it to repair shop on Thursday, still waiting to get it back, so i am now at the library using their computers to write. Hubby and i going through a tough patch with people, and i feel so down. I don’t know, maybe that’s why i am dreaming mentally ill dreams. But it happens even when i am more well. What the hell is going on with me. Hospital haunts me… In a strange way I miss it because I had contact with other mentally ill people, which was nice. Now i am so isolated. If it wasn’t for this group i would have no one else to write or talk to with sz.
Thank you for being here for me 
