Continuing the discussion from I'll stone you:
I have a nagging suspicion that there are tracking devices sewn into my clothing… I have to fight the urge to pull off my clothing were ever I am. I fight it… but there are days I come close to stripping off.
I wear sunglasses indoors often. I feel people can get in my head easier if they can see my eyes.
I think peeing in public should be legal in certain situations. Let’s face it sometimes you just can’t make it, just go man, thats what id say to the guy i saw pissing, just go, it will be our little secret.
Chips in the clothes and numerous other things will probably be a reality soon, secret or not is the question.
People can read very much from looking into your eyes. There is also a technology some use by peering into them, there is more than we are being told that can be seen through a person’s eyes. There is information in there.
I have the urge to masturbate quite often. Like right now. What I have a disease it’s not my fault. It’s either kill time by reading more or masturbating. I want more food. I also want something to occupy my mind other than this boring ass book. This chapter is tedious and no fun. What is fun is porn. That’s fun. I wanted to workout today but my right calf is extremely sore and that’s a bad idea. I’m working out with a friend tomorrow.
I have lots of urges, urges to scream, urges to destroy things, urges to slam books against my head, ect. Urges to do even worse things but I don’t want to come off as quite as ■■■■■■ up as I actually am.
Peeing outdoors is one of life’s great pleasures, lol.
Last night I had an urge to tear my skin off because apparently I was experiencing the condition called ‘itchy blood’. Knowing that its something which gets through the process of heroin withdrawal makes me wanna punch myself.
Recently I had a strong desire to publicly ■■■■ off a lot of stupid righteous ignorant and frustrated bitches of both genders.
I get the urge to shout at people who I feel are talking to my mind or shouting my thoughts. Particularly if I don’t have headphones working. I did it back in January, managed to escape before anyone was called in. Every time I leave the house they’re there, trying to get me to break. And they so nearly succeeded.
Sorry to hear you’re having a rough time James, do you know if there is any clothing that makes it easier? Like linen which is very flat and tight in nature, less seams etc? I know it creases far too easily but it may be worth a shot (you may need layers though, I’m not sure what sort of weather you’re encountering at present)? Maybe do some thought challenging/ evidence for and against on it? Talk it through. Well done on fighting the urges though, I know it must be hard for you, keep on trudging, you will get through!
Take care,
Meg.
I have to fight the urge to curse God and throw things and cut myself, its hard, but I’m getting there, so far so good, just a few scratches on my arm and a spiritual support group to help me on my road with God. 