LOL. Who comes up with this stuff?
YES! To a woman, the most important thing in a man is either what he is or has, or if he is or has nothing, then it is all important that he have the potential to become somebody or to get riches or income. At least that’s always what’s been important to my mother and I and my sister.
Seriously…?
Seriously. Because men still earn the majority of a households income. So, they have to be able to support a family. @TheCanuk
Granted I’m not speaking for all women. Just for the majority of women down the ages. @TheCanuk You gotta remember I’m older too.
If I ever become rich, i’m never going to allow a woman to use me for my money. I’ll gladly stay single @SkinnyMe
And I applaud you wholeheartedly, @TheCanuk!! I feel the exact same way you do. I never let anyone use me for my money either!!
I chose to date and then marry a man who was disabled with no sign of being able to work ever again.
I fell in love with him because he’s kind, loyal, loving, generous, a good dad, and a good friend. He has high standards and high morals. He has his bad days while going through withdrawal from his pain pump over time, but that doesn’t take away from him being a genuinely good person deep down to the core of his being.
Good for you, @LilyoftheValley. You’re a good woman.
I don’t know if I’m “good” but I know I care only about who the person is based on their heart and character
I don’t think potential is necessarily money. It could be potential qualities. But in most circumstances potential is a means to an ideal self.
All that sure wouldn’t be me. Not with my puggy belly. Or thinning hair,or missing teeth. Or low miles on my sports car.
I did, but then I got laid off and my wife went back to teaching. She still makes more than me but I am catching up!
A man could be potential marriage material and have good qualities like honest, trustworthy, caring with kids, a good father. These could all be a means to a lady seeing potential in a man. But men mostly ask what a woman looks like and women often ask what a man does for a living. Both are superficial, but true in a large subset. So to a woman potential might mean status in this regard. Status could be a persons persona like a fitness model on Instagram.
That’s the main reason why I’d rather be poor and out of a job. What’s the point of finding a woman if she’s there for your status? You wouldn’t want your friends to be there for your status yet somehow if it’s a woman it’s different? I don’t care what society thinks is normal, if you so much as value status I have nothing to say to you and you immediately lose my respect to gain my pity because you can only truly seek happiness without ever be able to reach it, on top of being the reason why our society is as messed up as it is at a fundamental level, in fact I am not even sure you are aware of what happiness or justice is if you interact with the world under that lense, man or woman. The only exception could be if your attachment to status is a trauma response, that I can get on board with.
I pick friends and women, and movies for that matter, under the same criteria, decent looking enough to not be directly unpleasant for me to look at and having an emotional profile I approve of. I fall in love with women or am interested in your friendship based on your subconscious, not your looks, your looks are there to not make me recoil at your touch, especially during the bonding phase, but what matters is: when you see a kitten, how do you feel? When you want to do something, how do you feel? What about when you don’t? When you are angry, what’s your anger like? When you feel safe are your inhibitions intact? That’s the sort of stuff that makes me attracted to you.
I don’t need to understand a lot about you in practical terms, if your emotions are good in my book you will naturally have interests and a character I at least approve of and behaviours that’ll never let me down(doesn’t mean I can’t dislike them, I just can’t dislike you for them) because you’d be incapable of feeling something I despise. You may do things I dislike but you’ll never be someone I dislike or dislike being with because I like you for something so deep about you that it’s shaped your whole experience since you were born. As a matter of fact I couldn’t dislike you if I wanted to, there would be no emotion in you for me to anchor my dislike to and I am not going to dislike people based solely on my emotions.
The trick is to find a woman who is more concerned with what is awesome than what is normal.
Postmodernism doesnt hold that psychology and behaviour has never changed but would say that the ways we view, think about and talk about psych and behavior changes what is true and to act corresponding to truth is based on that social construction.
Thats just illustrating the meme in OP isnt even close to pomo
If men can so blatantly choose their women in this society on the basis of the woman’s looks, then I see nothing wrong with women choosing their men on the basis of the man’s money.
@LilyoftheValley @shutterbug @TheCanuk @Pettyx
@2Waynez
I’m not certain what the ideal man is but I agree that in our current society status or perception, earning power or perceived value, and appearance are all major factors in choosing a mate, for either sex.