So I was diagnosed in the hospital with schizoaffective for the first time a few weeks back.
My therapist told me yesterday she doesn’t understand exactly what’s going on with me- could be schizoaffective, bipolar, or from ptsd.
Can you explain what happens when you go psychotic and your picture of symptoms in General?
I’m so confused and I feel like I just need some answers.
What does your every day look like symptom wise?
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My illness works in cycles. I’m schizoaffective bipolar.
Without meds I am anxious, angry, and very suspicious. I hear things- doors, cars, mumbling voices, and other household items going off. I believe my family is trying to drive me crazy so I’ll kill myself.
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How are you on meds? I have been on seroquel for a couple years now so my symptoms are dialed down, before then I was extremely obsessive and anxious. I only had a few psychotic breaks before I was on meds but I am only 26
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I’m SzA depressive type, my day normally consists of mild voices on and off, seeing ghosts and shadow people, weird thoughts and beliefs.
Couple times a year I go into a major depressive swing
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I have far less symptoms medicated. I don’t feel angry, don’t hear things, and my delusion about my family is gone.
I do have some delusions but will be working on them. I believe if I do or think things then bad stuff happens.
I still have a serious case of avolition- can’t do things and don’t find pleasure in the things I loved. I get a loot of anxiety and still get suspicious.
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That is me exactly too ooorgle.
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Does anyone have a symptom free day?
Same for me on meds, all of my positives are dialed down, stress is a factor too.
Meds haven’t helped with my negatives. I also have bad anhedonia and avolition
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I have good days when my symptoms dont Flair up as much. I love those days, I can feel normal again for a few hours
I have some days that are good. I enjoy hypomania. Those are great days.
So most of the time when I’m not taken over by psychosis I have mood symptoms usually depressed but hypomania happens occasionally. But most days I get weird thoughts that can trigger delusions, and my thoughts are always fast and confusing, like having multiple thoughts at once with a song looping in the background, no matter what my mood is.
Thanks for the replies 
I know no one will present the same but it helps getting personal accounts
When I’m psychotic the first thing that happens is I start getting paranoid again. First it’s just at night time then it’s during the day as well. Just freaking out over like people following me or watching me through cameras or demons being after me or ghosts or whatever. I get totally sucked into weird beliefs, for example thinking I’m going to be a warrior in the imminent apocalypse. I become so obsessed with them that I can’t focus on normal things in life like schoolwork and will do things like spend all class writing crazily about my experiences and thoughts.
My thoughts can become very chaotic and nonsensical like “The bones creak and cry when dry” and that can just repeat. My hallucinations can become much more vivid and frequent.
It’s hard to remember what psychotic episodes are like for me because I haven’t had a full episode in years now.
The mood episodes are terrible…the depression is so bad it feels like I’m being submerged in boiling oil for 2 weeks straight…everything feels like it was always horrible and will always be horrible and I’m obsessed with wanting to die to end the pain. The mood episodes make me a danger to myself and I have harmed myself before during and planned to kill myself. I haven’t had a major depressive episode in quite some time either though thank god. I don’t get mania but some people do.
Nowadays I am very stable on medication. I don’t really get any symptoms at all except for occasional voices. Off meds not in an episode I tend to get crazy mood swings, intrusive thoughts of wanting to hurt or kill myself, and have voices throughout the day and think about my odd beliefs whenever I’m not doing anything more important. When not in an episode so long as I’m getting good sleep I don’t really get paranoia. I do get visual and especially bad tactile hallucinations but they come and go.
Hope that helps. Just know schizoaffective or whatever you end up diagnosed with (I have schizoaffective and ptsd) is not a death sentence. I am in nursing school, am in a loving relationship, have plenty of friends and a job I can work whenever despite my diagnoses. It just takes time and therapy to learn to cope and the right medication and self care.
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I have sza bipolar too. I would get hallucinations in all sensory spheres: visual, auditory, tactile, gustatory, and olfactory. I would also get closed eye visual hallucinations as well. I would be paranoid around the clock thinking that the whole world hated me and was hostile. I would be paranoid and would think that I could read other people’s minds (thought reception), and their thoughts were bad and evil and all against me. I would feel like other people’s thoughts would bombard my brain. I felt like other people’s thoughts could actually drill big holes in my brain. I felt the Mafia, my ex husband, my brother, and serial killers were trying to kill me at different times.
I spent many years intensely depressed and suicidal over my divorce. And this went on 24/7. The only relief I got from it was when I was at work when I was temporarily distracted from the pain.
I was frequently in mixed manic phases where I was loud, angry, combative, irritable, and argumentative. I drove my car fast and got frequent stops, speeding tickets and accidents. I even had one manic phase where I had a one week long laughing fit. And I spent lots of money. Mostly on un needed services or scams. In short, my illness has been hell.
My mood is now even and calm. I have no psychosis either. I am happy to say. And I am med compliant. @Froge.
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On meds I am pretty much symptom free
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I have sza, mixed bipolar type, ptsd, and gen anxiety disorder w agoraphobia. I also have chronic insomnia.
I’m med compliant. I have alarms set to take meds. I sleep when I can.
I have delusions, paranoia, and hallucinations, daily. This is not ideal, I know. However, I’ve been worse.
I have negative symptoms, and have had 3 different ect series for depression. My anxiety is usually out of control, with at least one serious panic attack per day. When depression hits, everything stops. Everything means I lie in bed, begging for sleep.
Probably more than you wanted to know. I left out the ptsd. It’s too hard to talk about.
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I had bipolar since 15 and got schizophrenic symptoms (voices, visions, delusions) around age 30. I’m 34 now so for four years I’ve been schizoaffective, which is my official diagnosis. My success is determined almost completely by what antipsychotic I’m on. Right now Zyprexa is doing a good job bug a few others I’ve tried made things worse.
I spent 2 years believing I had died and was in a purgatory dimension where everything was a test. When that went away so did the rest of the delusions. The hallucinations stayed. I still hallucinate sometimes but I don’t have delusions anymore. I have had symptom free days. I am against trying new medications via injection, I think the pill form should be tried for a few months first. Had a bad experience with this in particular.
I am a lot better now than I was a few years ago. You can’t rush recovery, it might take you a few months or a year after the first episode to start getting things back together.
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The being dead delusion is actually what made them diagnose schizoaffective. My medication seems to be helping. It went away for a week and then came back but I’m going up again on my meds. Everything does feel like a test. I felt like the hospital was a test even. Did you feel that way every day? For me it seems to kind of come and go but that’s probably the meds
I agree I’m Schizoaffective bipolar type.
I get the mood swings when I don’t take my meds. Depression, anxiety, mania.
I also experience hallucinations like the fedora man. Hear voices of people I know
I felt that way every day until one day it stopped, after which I never felt that way again. Probably a result of my treatment and medication.
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Bc I’m not on meds at the moment for me I don’t notice if I am doing anything weird or acting a certain way but my boyfriend says i can go from happy to super sad. I am always worrying I have panic attacks bc I also have severe anxiety . My voices are always in my mind they never shut up I see things that I can’t describe. It sucks