If I do I would just sadden my family
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If you do what?
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If I died I mean
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Call 911 and tell them what is going on with you. If you donāt think you can make the drive yourself. Seek out help, we donāt want to lose you either. I for one would be saddened if you ended your life. We have a lot of great conversations in the past while you were working to make it into the US.
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Thank you Im going to consider calling them. Iām gonna stop before someone bans me here lol. Thank you for listening
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Please do consider calling. We are here to help, but you sound like you are hurting right now and need immediate professional care.
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I know people have posted this alreadyā¦.
But I wonder how Aziz is doingā¦
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Anyways- waiting for the mail man to get here.
Iām hoping thereās at least 1 Christmas card lolā¦ and I have a package coming.
Thatās my excitement for the day
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@Abise, youāre a great contributor to this forum. We care about you here and many people would be heartbroken if you hurt yourself. Please call for help
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I used to hear unintelligible whispering voices. They were the evil ones. I could feel it.
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I volunteered about half a hour.
Left early because it felt like someone was supressing me.
Donāt know who.
Reason I isolate is because most people or lot of people try to suppress me n put me down n make me uncomfortable.
Why Iām alone with my dog most of the time.
I only go out for groceries n stuff.
Wasnāt as bad as two vet girls but was enough for me to feel uncomfortable.
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Incubusā¦ i think
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Well, i got accepted a few days ago into that private DID forum I mentioned, but I just PMd the administrator to delete my account. Itās private but I feel too exposed, yet I post here on a public forum. DID is a lot more triggery than sza for me, my very early trauma is contained in that illness. Just canāt share that stuff with strangers and read theirs. If i could have seen the forum beforehand I would not have registered. I feel really unsafe now until that account goes kaput. 
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IMP for sure if for no other reason than DOOM
@anon10627598
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I hope they delete your account soon @anon39736208. It was worth a try to see if it would have helped you.
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Rish people take note:
I really want this instrument. Badly. If I get it I promise Iāll play the fanned frets off this thing.
Seriously, when I get the $$$, Iām getting this unique beast. A 7 string aligned as 3 bass strings and 4 guitar strings, with stereo outs for bass and guitar. 2 humbuckers for guitar, and one pbass pickup for bass. My mind is salivating over the possibilities I could achieve with an instrument like this. Not to mention the gorgeous spalted maple top, highly figured. This beast is definitely on my list.
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Iv
BTW it is a BATWING, a division of MUSOO music
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Iām already up for the day. Itās 1:30 am here.
Just had a banana and coffee. Put the heating on.
My sister came to visit me yesterday and we had a good conversation with some laughs. Iām very happy about that.
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Hey kiddos!
Iāve been having kind of a shitty day.
My apartment got inspected this morning and I wasnāt expecting it so soon in the week. They gave us 6 days notice and were already up our asses today.
So basically I failed miserably because my apartment looks terrible. And my landlord said I have 14 days to clean and if I fail again Iāll be evicted.
This is just too much goddamn stress right before Christmas.
My mom said sheāll come over tomorrow though and help me clean.
Worst case scenario if I do get evicted I can probably go into the VAās homeless program or just go live in my momās basement with my brother.
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