Our lives are a gift, we are all like individual precious gems
We should respect life and our bodies and each other and our surroundings
I wish the best for all of us however we live make it good 
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I struggle with suicidal thoughts often so i have to keep repeating this mantra that life is a gift because it is and i don’t know why i get hopeless sometimes but i wish i could stop
Im going to try going to a community group sometimes its only a small one but it probably would help and be worth it
I went there yesterday its like a crisis cafe/ group with activities. It was good
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I do too… not wanting to wake up each morning, and the depression and PTSD from the psychosis makes me want to not be here anymore. To me it is a struggle that I don’t want anymore. But each time I wake up, feeling depressed and voices bother me. Nothing I can do about it, meds increase didn’t help. I wanted to be homeless because of it, but now I need surgery and cannot be homeless.
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100% agree! What a gift we have.
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Its hard to say the right things
I hear you i also struggle so i know kinda how you feel
I hope we both can get through it all and live long & peaceful
Its really hard trying to cope but we must keep trying
Hope your surgery goes well
I just bailed on an assessment for one of these places
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I did too the first time and walked out after 5 minutes
You should give it a chance maybe one day because it can get you through suicidal episode
Ps it isnt overnight thing here its just a small centre with lots of arts and crafts and help yourself to tea and coffee
This one is run by Mind
I have bailed on them 3 times now
Was referred to them by social services
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I probably don’t live long, would be terrible if I did. Don’t like old age and all the illnesses that come with it. At some point I have to put an end to it, that is the hardest choice I have to make.
Theres nothing i can really say to that @anon84628834
Theres nothing wrong with old age and weve all gotta die eventually
It sounds like your suicidal episodes are a lot worse than mine are.
I get them suddenly but they usually go away pretty quickly too
Have you tried getting any support?
Speak to your doctor
Try different antidepressants maybe
Youve had this a long time so it wont go away overnight
Hugs 
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I stepped out today to pick up four items at a grocery store. I’m glad I did it.
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I think that’s a great idea. I hope it reduces your suicidal thoughts. Just remember you may need to go for a while before you see a huge change. It’ll help over time.
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I know nobody gets it
Unless you experience it yourself you don’t understand
Im sorry you go through this too
I feel overwhelming sadness and hopeless often it sweeps me up
Im going to ask my pdoc next week for an antidepressant, its my 6 month review
Im going to force myself to go to this crisis place as well
I can’t give up
And no we absolutely dont have to do something bad. We must keep trying
Ps we cant discuss anything too bad or topic will be closed
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Yes I do, don’t feel anything. Sometimes wish that it would stop.
I’ve spent some time at community centers but they always seem to treat me with suspicion.
EDIT: There is also an I.O.P (Intensive Outpatient Program) around here that I went to for a while, that was better that way.
Recently I found a pickup soccer game in the area that I can go to.
That is also a feeling I got… not sure if it my own, or theirs. Can be an odd place
I have never seen a life as a gift. I see it as punishment for nothing.
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welcome to the forum @robertobag
i used to see life as punishment too but now i am more stable i can enjoy some little things and i look different at it… but it took over 10 years of trying meds and stuff to feel like this.
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I guess its not to surprising with people that may, very well, be paranoid.
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