No i think you are not just imagining it. I get it at school now and is was worse in high school is could just be the drive to fit in, to apart of something different to be special…to not be normal to stand out? when i had the break at hs i really did stand out bitting and attacking the cop that was trying to get me into the car and i had to be stunned and i wet myself yea standing out there not in a fun or good way
Yes people are addicted and attracted to pain to the broken person, i was and am now in a s/D type relationships, this one is the most supporting and healing one i had. The older ones, yes people was attracted to me, being my looks i looked 14 well into my middle 20’s and i only just look 19/20 now.
So why would someone do out of they way to pick a broken messed up girl like me? Maybe is was coming form a gorean training, thankfully im free of! Free Woman now! HA! If you not read the books or know about the life that’s going to not make much sense. But people did i know now that they was using me but living in a hallution full world…That could be a song.
Why in gods name would you want to pick having sz/sza? or act like it? That i’m not sure of but people do
Same as the question of why do others try to get us to prove are sz/sza to them? this is a problem online as i had people try to set me off and act like laptop doctors.
Sorry thats more questions than answers