My ocs is killing me, I have been thinking about that I have contracted HIV for good 8 days in a row, constant obession/intrusive thoughts 24/7. The deal is I had unprotected sex with a trans woman 4-5 years ago and contracted chlamydia, which I got treated in a sexual health clinic. I dont remember fully if I had flu like symptoms at all, as far as I know someone who got infected with HIV has chornic diarrhea or a rash and I cant remember having them. The trans girl said she got tested 4 times and all came negative and she works in the NHS, so I doubt she would lie to me.
These thoughts are killing me, im so anxious to make an appointment with my GP and ask for a HIV test, cause in my country HIV is heavily stigmatized as homophobia is widespread.
I had some tests done after I contracted initial chlamydia for HIV, but might had been to early to show anything, I cant remember after how many days I got tested for it. I would had tasted again, but I was already relapsing schizophrenia wise.
Can someone calm me down? I mean if I had had contracted HIV, wouldnt I have had some serious symptoms for a week or two? Cause i dont remember having any of them like enlarged lymph nodes, rash and others. I am so afraid to get tested in my home country, also I would need to pay it.
This thought is stopping me from living, I mean this OCD…
i have been obsessing very hard recently