My husband is coming to the pdoc with me tomorrow, I think its weird

Last week my doctor asked if it would be at all possible to talk to my husband, the three of us.

I told him my husband is a super busy dude and that’s unlikely.

Then he said if he can’t come in, maybe he could call in during my appointment time, it would take ten minutes, tops.

So, I asked my husband and guess what? He’s made a break in his schedule and is coming with me.

What is this?

Why does the pdoc want to talk to him.

I’m kind of afraid he’s going to say some stuff I don’t want the pdoc to know, like how bad off I’ve been the last few months,

Worse, just hearing him talk about how bad I’ve been.

Oy vey!

Whose been in this situation?

Do you think its weird?

Would you want your spouse involved?

Tell me your thoughts…

It’s a personal decision really. My psychiatrist wanted to involve members of my family and I said no.

Edit: I’m not married etc. though.

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I think its weird… i had to take my 3 year old and tried to color an iron man picture while being hit with 100 questions… it was like a bizarro world final exam. Too stressful lol…

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I just don’t understand what he wants to ask him, specifically?

My husband has come with me to an appointment. He proceeded to tell the doctor that I’m not ok and the meds aren’t helping. I could see my husband was frustrated with that. It was hard to hear but also good for my pdoc to know. I’m still in the same boat however - still haven’t found the magical medicine that convinces me none of this is real. I’m trying to believe everyone though that it’s not real, it’s just that it’s so real to me.

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Did your doctor have any questions for him or was it just your husband kind of giving his opinion on treatment?

My psychiatrist wanted to get my father involved.
He had to fill in special consent forms.
I gave him permission.
It’s up to you.

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My husband came without the Dr prompting it, but once my husband started talking the Dr asked questions.

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My ex-wife came to a couple appointments with me, back when we were married. My psychiatrist just wanted to get my wife’s point of view, as someone who lives with me and may notice changes in my behavior that are not noticeable for me.

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I don’t have a spouse but I’ve been asked if I could bring my parents to appointments and I refused. It does seem weird to me

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It’s probably because the doc doesn’t trust you so they want a more “valid” opinion. That’s what it’s always been with my doctors at least.

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My Fiance came to an appointment this past summer. It was weird talking to the pdoc with him in the room too. He only spoke at the end, kind of advocating some concerns we had that I couldn’t articulate. I’d let him come again to an appointment if he wanted to or the pdoc asked to see him.

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My therapists and doctors have only ever wanted to involve my family to help them help me.
I’ve never brought my family to an appointment, though. There’s no way I’m ever doing that.

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Sounds like he wants to get different perspectives of your illness and maybe he would like to see how the two of you interact? I would think the more info (views) the better he understands you and your illness thus better treatment.

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My wife used to come to my appointments in the beginning. Then she challenged the shrink and my diagnosis and he told her she didn’t have to come anymore.

My wife says he was a male chauvinist.

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Sounds like it might be a good thing - work together on this. Also - here is something everyone should review before they go to a doctor’s meeting:

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The first time I ever saw a psychiatrist I wanted my husband in with me because I was scared but the pdoc wanted to talk to me alone. Then he brought in my mother and husband later.

Then, with that same pdoc most of my appointments he would bring in my mother or father (or husband if he was with me, I was living interstate from him at the time) at the end of appointments to go over what he had instructed me to do because I wasn’t taking anything in.

Same happens now. Husband comes in at the start of the appointment, helps remind me of the weird shit) I’ve experienced since last visit and takes mental notes on coping strategies etc.

I’ve done pdoc appoitnments on my own but I leave not knowing what went on a lot of the time, not all of the time, but a lot of the time.

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My doc did that with my wife. I think he was questioning things I told him and want another insight. I didn’t mind and I think it helped the doc help find what was and wasn’t real in my life . Hasn’t asked for her to come in since.

Ur asking a really valid question. I’m not married but after my last full blown psychosis my parents got involved in my treatment. There’s something after having all ur life and rights stripped away and having to live with them to get back on your feet that u ultimately just get used to it.

I’ve been pretty stable so I have nothing to worry about when I go in with my doctor and my mother but if I was worse off I would have a huge issue with it… especially if the doctor was the one who asked. Their job is to treat u the best they can if they feel they need another’s viewpoint, as innocuous as it may be, it just seems like they aren’t up to the job treating u for what you say you’re coming in for.

I’d just be paranoid that they’d try to overmedicate me again if my mom happened to say the wrong thing. Maybe just go over some ground rules with ur hubby before going in?

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He wouldn’t say anything to embarrass me and he wouldn’t lie or exaggerate,

Really I don’t know why this put me off.

I guess I’m less afraid of what my husband would say and more concerned about why they asked.

Thanks everyone!

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