Medicines also kill creativity and I think that will not exist another Brian Wilson so soon

My music was never perfect, since I am on paliperidone my motivation is lost and the way I used to hear changed. Is any one experiencing this with music playing, composing or improvising?
I am presenting my improvisational style here as a guitarist:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHphoEYLhAk3g134l9Trx1g This is not a new recording, I played again guitar since then but I feel nothing now, and lost learning ability. It is hard to learn new concepts and to keep a schedule to practice. I am a loner lately and maybe a need more inspiration in life. Woman used to inspire me. I think it should a exist a virtual site for those who do not have access to paid lessons, to exchange knowledge and experiences or even to practice in virtual jam sessions. Any musicians or music students out there? I would like to hear your opinions.

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I play guitar and banjo but don’t have much motivation. Most of the songs I play are covers but I wrote them all down once and I know almost over 300 songs on the guitar. I wish you luck. I have no way to play virtually or anything. no microphone or recording equipment. sorry.

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I will check this when i get home and can watch youtube but its really cool you are doing this…ill probably subscribe…

plugging a song here for the hell of it

I believe you can become sharp again in this creative area if you’ve been on a med long enough. I think the creative dullness is due to your body adjusting to the med

when an idea or phrase comes to me, it’s when not inspired at all, walking around the house, pacing my kitchen, having nothing going on, pondering, day dreaming. Good luck, though. If I get into my writing again, maybe you are the person I’ve been looking for to work with on writing a musical. hmm?

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My personal experience with meds and creativity has been awful. The change from on meds to on no meds now (and doing better than ever) is black and white. I never adjusted and I noticed a lot of deficits to areas of thinking that were all somewhat inline with creative mental processing, not just art. I have sketchbooks from high school and I can see a semester’s progress that was affected by several med adjustments and changes. I am sure there are people who don’t find their creativity affected but I know it’s a common complaint and it’s one of the more tragic for any sort of creative person. It can be its own special prison…like the schizophrenia isn’t bad enough. Being creative is incredibly therapeutic so losing that ability kills a lot of you in many ways.

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Amazing jukebox… I almost have not repertoire. Work on progress. I improvise at the right moment, that`s what I want to develop spontaneous composition soloing specially. Did you transcribe the songs? I would like to learn something from you… Thanks, I would like to hear from you.

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Hi crsaen, is “Lost Vision” yours? Sounds interesting… are you an electronic musician? Your opinion is important to me, there are lots of studies about music ability and schizophrenic condition,but they seem pretty contradictory sometimes and not conclusive. When I do feel nothing I do not improvise equally, then if motivation is very low I avoid the instrument. It is chemical and psychological. If we want to do something more professional we need to present ourselves to our work everyday and not when we are in the mood only.
When I was on Abilify I had many problems but felt like a musical phenomenon in me, I started even to sing, what I have never tried before. I also used to drive euphorically and fast, there was something in my mood.

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@Dreamy I have no way to show you any of the songs. I apologize. Someday I will get a skype outfit and try to share.

Dreamy, Jukebox is a great visual artistic too, I have two of his works in my house.

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Daze, I feel the same. In music sometimes I am trying to practice scales up and down and when unexpected beautiful tones and motifs come up to my playing almost by accident. Solitude makes me thoughtful too, and some people motivate and inspire too. Immersion in the work is important for me. We are always getting influences from each other, I would play for you if I can. Right now I am mentally blocked I need to go back to studies to improve quality and knowledge. Thats why I am looking for a study group in music, even if virtual. I would like to appreciate your writings. Whats your main style and genre? I like video and the basics of “scenography” without many resources and possible basic light effects (not sure), basically to create a nice ambient to my home videos. Something interesting would be to add deep thoughts, phrases and writings, to make a quality video with meaning, poetry also fits sometimes, to complement instrumental music. For example a deep phrase or thought present a song at the end or at the begging may add value too. If you want we can keep in touch to see if my creativity comes back. Thanks for your kind reply. :slight_smile: adding value.[quote=“Daze, post:5, topic:49645, full:true”]
when an idea or phrase comes to me, it’s when not inspired at all, walking around the house, pacing my kitchen, having nothing going on, pondering, day dreaming. Good luck, though. If I get into my writing again, maybe you are the person I’ve been looking for to work with on writing a musical. hmm?
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I did my first painting about one month ago, it was just an experiment, music and visual arts seem to complement… It gave me some pleasure when it was done.[quote=“Daze, post:10, topic:49645, full:true”]
Dreamy, Jukebox is a great visual artistic too, I have two of his works in my house.
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hmm, ok.

the interesting thing, I have to be in the state of unawares most of the time, it’s Negative Capability, it was what Keats taught us.

It is ok jukebox…don`t worry. Keep your creativity and art if you can. Thanks.

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You are right nodrugs. My dilemma is that without medicines my mental state is not very consistent, I enter in a world of logical fallacies without reasoning very well. I believe there might exist some alchemy, a kind of chemical tuning that might help. Maybe has to do with the lowest effective dose which is difficult to determine. Some doctor prefer over medication for several reasons. I am waiting for better days.

To improvise and play we immerse in the sound.

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if you’ve felt you had some telepathic power,

it might be something you said, wrote and thought, being unaware,
for instance, I told my friends, I want to see Spain,

one week later, terrorist attack in Spain.

I know this is kind of unrelated. It’s what you don’t know,
that let’s it happen on it’s own.

but yeah, I like your motivation. good.

My motivation? it is very bad now… I named what your described “inverted randomness”, something like to throw a dice oppositely, since the result until the time it was thrown to the table.

ok, yes, trying to focus all the random parts of what makes something stick.

But you can start out not knowing anything, just putting something out there, like a finger in the wind,
and you’d be surprised what might happen.

Also, I come up with stuff by mistakes. I’ve heard other writers and artists do this too. Let me know if you want me to explain.

I can not describe exactly, it happens in both ways, it has to do with memories and ideas. I feel I have something to say with my instrument and music, and sometimes inspiration comes, then a phrase which I know from the musician Vernon Reid fits very well here: “Beautiful tones speak to me, it takes me to the unexplored territory” or another phrase “music is the noise that thinks”…