Is it too late?

I wish to be an expert in a field. But it seems I know a little about everything but not a lot about anything. I regret my only passions growing up was sports and rap music. I guess I am an expert in classic rock or music in general. But I’m hoping for a more field of academia. I don’t know why I should desire this but I do. I wish I had become especially interested in nature and animals since I was a wee lad. But I focused all my energy growing up on sports and rap. Two near worthless subjects. At least, I don’t like, the culture behind those. But it seems I am always trying to catch up. And I will never catch up because I get discouraged and focus energy on another field, rather than rolling with the tides. And just being natural. Well I am told I am very serene although it doesn’t sound like it by this post. So maybe my past interest in eastern philosophy has rubbed off on me. Although it isn’t a field you become an expert in, it is probably the most useful of them all imo. Because it’s a philosophy of peace tranquility and serenity. Which I value greatly. So maybe I should just accept my losses and embrace the fact I am peaceful and serene which in turn will make me more peaceful and serene. I can go with the flow and not compete for expertise. I’m really just thinking out loud here. But I can continue my studies as they come, not force it, not compare myself to others, and whatever will be will be.

Jack of all trades - Master of none? I’d take being a jack of serenity, sounds nice.

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Yes!!! Also there is a baseball player, Aaron judge on the Yankees I am a huge fan of. He is on pace to be my favorite athlete ever because not only is he beastly and powerful and awesome but he is very humble off the field. Normally I don’t like athletes because they are too egotistical but Aaron judge is awesome because of his personality. He is my protector in emdr because I said he has the yin and yang of power and humility. My therapist said “you value humility greatly” and I said yes I do. It doesn’t hurt that he’s 6’7 280 lbs. very good protector!!

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also Judge is a great last name

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It is never too late to do whatever you want / dream to achieve !!