Extreme poverty has my wife thinking she might move to Iowa. this isn’t the first time…I think she means it this time. Her sisters are there and her one sister has enough room for her to stay…I guess with the 3 dogs…she was pissed…but so am I…it’s not my fault we can’t get by on what I make plus helps from my mom…we aren’t broke but I forgot to include the internet bill and it took away all our extra food money…she is pissed…I don’t blame her…but damnit…you have to LEAVE?
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That’s so sad it really is the prices of gas and ducking grocery’s are insane especially In places like Vancouver in Canada idk about Iowa but I’m assuming it’s bad there too the freaking CEO’s don’t give two sh*ts about us as long as they make more money people have to buy less
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Do you really think she wants to leave you? Im Sorry to hear that. Can you not go with her to Iowa?
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@anon55055794 she’s talking with her sister in her room right now and doesn’t want to talk to me for the rest of the day she said…so yes, it always feels like she’s leaving…she did this about a year ago…so frustrating…then she pops out of it when she actually grasps leaving…I know she loves me, but it’s a distant love to tell you the truth. I don’t want her to leav at all…waiting.
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Oh Im Sorry to hear that. It does not sound good that it is a distant love. Do you think you could have marriage counseling?
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I doubt it…it’s a long story…there is resentment from both sides actually…wouldn’t hurt but she probably won’t go for counseling…I’d be into it.
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Im Sorry to hear that
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I’m sorry to hear this @jukebox. We’re here for you.
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thanks…this is her way of fighting back against our lives…I accept it. but I don’t like it.
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Im sorry your going through this @jukebox
Stay patient and she just needs time to work things out maybe
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Isn’t it funny how the partner changes from… to the end to… you have caused too much damage by this illness/ something you can control… I’m sorry hun… i don’t think this illness is compatible with human ability
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My husband and I are really struggling financially, but I wouldn’t leave him for it. If I want more money that bad, I need to find it in me to earn money (more than my SSDI).
The same goes for your wife. She is just as responsible as you to bring in money. I say this as a mentally and physically disabled person.
If she keeps holding the threat of leaving you over your head all the time, then she’s emotionally and mentally abusing you. That’s something for you to seriously think about
I’m sorry this is happening to you. It really sucks
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Actually, I agree with this. It’s not just you @jukebox. It’s a two-way street
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I hope things work out
The issue of money is seriously stressing my relationships now with loved ones, I hope it does not tear us apart.
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@jukebox loves his wife and would sacrifice a lot for her and is doing
Your a good man jukes but remember to take care of yourself too
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Does she get any income at all ? Like SSI for example ?
I agree that its.not just up to you to bring in money. And yeah she cant just threaten to leave you when things dont go her way.
My partner did something so stupid the other month raking up an overdraft debt by buying games. Yes i was angry and some trust has been lost but we work through it not threaten to leave.
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It seems a little defeating to keep 3 dogs when you have financial problems.
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Hope things have settled and you guys are ok.
This is a good point. Anyhow, I hope you and the Missus can get it sorted @jukebox.
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She needs someone to say, “Listen Lady, it’s not all about you. Marriage comes with good and bad.” She knew you had no money going into the marriage so it’s not a surprise.
We’ve been going through a terrible rough patch recently. It had to do with multiple factors. We considered separation even. But we went to therapy and talked a lot.
Sometimes you have to dig really really really deep to find those feelings of hope, gratitude, love, contentment, affection, happiness when you are in circumstances you have no control over. But if you choose not to dig deep and look hard, life can be very depressing and angry. While you have every right to have negative emotions, it’s not healthy.
The great thing about marriage is that you can emotionally support each other. You don’t each have to be alone in misery. If there is no equal support, then your marriage breaks down. She needs to find a way to support you, and you can work more on balancing the finances so she sees you are trying your best.
Best of luck.
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