Was 15 when I had my first major break. I thought the angels talking to me were real. I killed myself to become one of them. I didn’t try, I was dead for a while, clinically dead for a bit.
Snow dusted mountain caps to the north and east, pathways sprawling like spiderwebs through the gorges and valleys.
To the south was an ever expansive sea, clear and blue, never ending. Soft waves lapping at white marble sand.
To the west was forest and fields. I always adventure west. Elysian. Pure. Full of bio energy and potential for life.
I spent what felt like years there while I was dead. Lifetimes passed in blinks. Again and again.
I still long for my old home, it may not be real, it is a long way away from here. I hope I can go back some day.
Until then I just wait and try to make the best of this realm.
I’ve no suicidal ideals. No plan. I like this realm and the things in it. Regardless of my detachment to belief in the validity of this current realm, I still treasure it for the most part.
It may be more of a “I want to visit there again someday, spend more time while I decide what to do next after this life”
Stuck in my meat puppet prison for now. I’m here for a long while.
When I fell, I passed through a realm of ice and darkness.
I could hear digging under the ground, barriers of permafrost between the beast and I, as I grope in the darkness. Starless, sunless. Even the soul shivers at that place.
I’ve seen the fires. The chasm and a sea of writhing bodies, naked and fornicating, I don’t know if it’s punishment or pleasure at that point.
“Burn them clean, purity is important.” What are they trying to feed?
I see the same behavior in the eye of man. A doomed race. Not many will bypass a great filter. Only a few will gain divinity.