Too lazy for that and I can barely get out of bed.
That’s a problem you’re going to have to figure out. I’ve spent nearly thirty years being promised that each next med would fix negative symptoms. They lie every time. The solution is going to have to come from you if you want your life back.
Will I be medicated for life now??
That is highly likely. Also not that big of a deal, it’s a problem that can be worked around.
You need to be doing really well for a long time before drs will consider letting you try to taper off and see how it goes. The most important thing right now is to concentrate on getting better by being treatment compliant. That means take your meds and participate in any therapy they sign you up for. Also ask them for help on learning to control your anger.
I used to fist fight with one of my bros. Until one day we decided to stop because one of us would get seriously injured. We’re both mellow now and good friends.
My brother is one stripe away from a black belt in brazilian ju jitsu so he would probably turn me into a pretzel now ,. I did a bit of muay thay
I did Kung Fu for a few years when I was young.