“Welcome, my new friend.
Welcome friend within.
Come to view my sanctum,
My dirty vacation:
Lush gardens,
Bright but gray rains,
Psychedelic flashes,
Maze without exits.
Inhabiting the realm:
Me
And all of me, indeed;
All of me I see.
There are so many:
The boy, the man,
The different ones.
Entwined, all my own.
Its not so bad here–
Only if you let it be.
Let it be
All you ever needed.”
Sometimes, my symptoms make me feel like I’m lost in a maze, and can’t find my way out. So, after all these years, I decided to make the maze beautiful and enchanted. So that it’s not so bad here anymore.
I have a field of blackberry vines on trellises like a vineyard. They are “black satins” a thornless variety. They grow on a strong cliff, over looking an azure blue sea edged by a forest of oak trees. It’s always morning there, and the berries are always covered with a fresh morning dew. It’s my favorite place in my head and when I get too upset with what is going on around me, I end up in the blackberry filed in my head.
I find that I was battling my brain, and your poem sort of reminds me of this.
My brain said… “haha, I put you on a cliff far away so you are isolated and can’t reach out.”
So I said, eventually, “haha, I make this cliff lovely and serene and no one can hurt me.”
Your maze sounds little like the same thing to me. The brain says “haha, I put you in a maze to confuse you and keep you.”
So you say, “haha, I make this maze lovely and helpful to me. Then I get out and come back when I want.”
It’s hard work, but little things like this really help get the brain to calm down for me.
I’m glad that @SurprisedJ and I were able to help you!
Maybe you can start writing about all the things and sights that make you feel safe and protected. And then be inspired to create a mental space for yourself.
It really does seem to help with stress levels to have a safe space in the head. If one corner of the mind can hold some calm and order, then it might grow through out the rest of the mind.
The place in my head became patterned after a picture I saw in an over sized travel book about Italy. I used to almost hoard coffee table travel books just for the serenity.
There is a place in my head that is probably a safe place. But I don’t know - there might be danger there underneath things. Harsh reality comes in and says “No place is all safe.” Maybe there are some allies or even guardians there.
Once you get familiar with the maze, enough so every twist ,turn and dead end becomes second nature, you can then start by going to the hardest spot to find, and build your inner sanctum to meet your needs.
Then the once enemy of all the confusion and distress turn instead to become a friend. It keeps others from finding your safe place, and protects you from harm.
